FearLESS Riding Success. PART 4: Overcome Any Fear Anytime. The 7 Step Process to Overcoming Fear. 1. Acknowledge Your Fear

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Melanie Blair
5 years ago
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FearLESS Riding Success Part 4: Overcome Any Fear Anytime FearLESS Riding Success Module 1: Overcome Your Fear PART 4: Overcome Any Fear Anytime Hi FearLESS Riding Superstars!

1 FearLESS Riding Success Part 4: Overcome Any Fear Anytime FearLESS Riding Success Module 1: Overcome Your Fear PART 4: Overcome Any Fear Anytime Hi FearLESS Riding Superstars!! Welcome to the last part of Module 1!! I am so proud of you for sticking with it, digging deep and really creating change... and we are not even there yet! I really want to acknowledge you and applaud you for getting to this point. As a coach, I can help you with whatever fear you have right now. But I want to make sure you have the tools and techniques at your fingertips to help you whenever you need - because guess what? The fear keeps coming. It s not like you will be never scared of another thing in your whole life - there will be other challenges in your life!! I want you to make sure when this does happen that you can refer back to this program and work through it again and move on! :) The 7 Step Process to Overcoming Fear 1. Acknowledge Your Fear Most of the population will not acknowledge that we have fear. We will not admit that we have fear, even if inside we are freaking out!! Basically, admitting to your fear is making yourself vulnerable. I have worked with clients before that have said that they want to improve your competition results and anxiety around competitions... and I have then told them that they will not improve their results at competition until they have worked through their innate fear of being judged and people looking at you - and 9 times out of 10, they will get defensive about it, and will not admit to it!! They don t want to acknowledge the fear - they want to keep their story, they want to keep their excuse. When you get defensive about something, this is because you don t want to deal with the issue.

2 2. Find Out What the Root Cause Is You have got to keep digging, and you will know when you have found the root cause. What is your fear? And why do you have this fear? Why? Keep digging until you find deep down what the fear is all about. Find the internal cause of the external fear - the external fear will probably be something you can t control... so there must be an internal cause to the problem that you CAN control. The only thing you can control is the response to the external factor. You have to get to the point where YOU take responsibility and where you work on YOU!! The ONLY thing you can work on is YOU - if you change your horse changes :) 3. Work on the Root Cause What is it that you are actually afraid of - what is the root cause? Then you need to do different exercises and different techniques to work through this fear and. This is what we will be working on in Module 3 - there is 4 parts on this!! This will help you trust yourself, believe in yourself and have that confidence. Yes you were born with this, but most of us lose this because life affects us in this way - but it s about reconnecting with it and rediscovering it! 4. Identify and Remove Secondary Gain Why do you want to keep the fear? What do you gain from having this fear? What is the payoff? Fear keeps you small, perhaps people fuss over you, do things for you, give you attention. When you remove the fear, you can t do the behaviour anymore!! And that s scary! But when you work through it everything changes! 2

3 5. Use NLP Techniques to Release the Fear This is what we are working through in Module 2 - starting next month!! I cannot wait to teach you and train you and help you to understand how your brain works. When I discovered NLP my life changed! NLP is the manual that you get for your brain - like when you get a new TV you need to read the manual to work out how it works!! That s what NLP is for your brain! We can work out how to decode your brain, work out how it works and how you can change the settings. I want to teach you all of the NLP techniques I use and I know work so that you can also make sure you have a great ride on your horse! 6. Take Action You will learn of these techniques, you will learn how to overcome your fear... but you still have to put your foot in the stirrup and ride! So that s where the action has to happen. Part of taking action is having self belief, confidence and trust. I am going to teach you in the third module how to install all of this. Then you can take action... and the more action you take the more you realise you can do something... and the more you realise you can do something... the more action you take... and so on. It s an upward spiral. 7. Be Patient With Yourself You are going to make mistakes and things aren t always going to work out perfectly, but if you just stay patient and stay committed and stay to taking action I know you will get the results you want. That s it!! That s the 7 step process to overcoming your fear - any fear, any time something is going on with you, you can go back to the program and work back through the 7 steps again! I want to remind you - remember the power of focus: what you focus on is what you get, to the exclusion of everything else. When I come into a situation where I might feel fear - I consciously focus on the positives in the situation rather than the bad of the situation. 3

4 When you are riding a horse - you can only feel fear or love - so focus on the fear of when your horse is shaking his head or doing something silly - and I guarantee you will not have a good ride. Or you can focus on the good parts of the ride - how great your horse is, how that last transition was perfect - and you will have a good ride. So the ride wasn t good or bad... it was whatever you made it! We get 2 million bits of information coming at us every second, and we filter this information down to around 7 bits of information - so what parts are you focusing on? So what I want you to remember is whenever you are having a challenge in your riding, whenever you are feeling fear - go back to this 7 step process. The other thing I want you to realise is that fear is your green light to go, fear is your stepping stone to success. I know I have told you before that fear is a good thing, and that fear pushes us out of our comfort zone and that this is a good thing because then we learn and we grow and become better versions of ourselves. If you remember this - your riding and your life will change. 99% of the population does the opposite - when they feel fear, they stop and they don t continue. This is why all of the population is not hugely successful and hugely happy - this belongs to the 1%. And rightly so - the one percenters are the ones that go the extra mile, they are doing what it takes, they are pushing themselves. So when you are going through all of this - remember that you want to be one of the 1%!! You have what it takes, you have invested in you. There is so much for you to learn, and so much for you to be able to push. I can t wait to share your success with you! The 7 Step Process for Overcoming Fear - Exercise (please note: some questions you will not be able to answer until the program has been completed in full). 1. Acknowledge the fear My fear is 2. Find out the root cause of the fear I am really afraid of 4

5 And what scares me about that is And that scares me because And that scares me because And this is a problem because 3. Work on the Root Cause My old beliefs not serving me were (refer to part 9): My new beliefs are (refer to part 9): Instead of fear I want to have (refer to part 10): 5

6 Which means I have to do (refer to month 10): Which means I have to be (refer to part 10): My character if confidence is (refer to part 11): My teeny tiny next step of action is (refer to part 11): 6

7 I am the leader I need to be by (refer to part 12): I know I can trust myself because (refer to part 12): 4. Identify and Remove Secondary Gain What do I get from having this fear? How can I meet these needs another way? 7

8 5. Use NLP Techniques to release the fear The old way I used to code this information using the communication model was (refer to part 5): The new way I remember the event using the communication model is (refer to part 5): My old anchor for fear was (refer to part 6): My new anchor for confidence is (refer to part 6): 8

9 My submodalities for fear were (refer to part 7): My submodalities for confidence are (refer to part 7): My reframe for the fear is (refer to part 8): My new language for the fear is (refer to part 8): 9

10 6. Take Action My next teeny tiny step of action is (refer to module 3): 7. Be Patient What am I focussing on? Fear or love? How can I change my focus, and therefore change my results? CONGRATULATIONS!!!!! You have completed Part 4 and the whole of the first module! Coming your way next month is the first part of Module 2 - starting to look at the NLP techniques you can use in your riding and your life to conquer your fears! 10

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