DD PRINTED IN USA Lilly USA, LLC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. A Step-by-Step Approach to Building a Personal Network of Support

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1 DD PRINTED IN USA Lilly USA, LLC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. A Step-by-Step Approach to Building a Personal Network of Support

2 STEP 2: Choosing ASupport Partner The Power of Support....9 Finding the Best Support Partner for You...11 Things to Think about Before Choosing What if You Can t Think of Someone? STEP 3: Asking For Support How to Ask for Support...17 Do You Need More than one Support Partner?. 19 What if Someone says No"? STEP 4: Building a Partnership Learning about Depression Together How can Your Support Partner Help You? Setting Future Goals STEP 5: Managing Your Depression INTRODUCTION TO SUPPORT PARTNERS PROGRAM How can Support Help You?....1 What is a Support Partner?....2 How do I use this Guidebook?...3 STEP 1: Recognizing Depression What is Depression?....5 The Goal of Treatment...8 Seeking Help From a Doctor Mapping Out a Care Plan Depression and Suicide Holding the Hope Keeping a Diary...31 Setting Goals Taking Care of Yourself... 34

3 Introduction to Support Partners Support Partners is a program for people with depression and the people who care about them. How can Support Help You? Depression can make people feel alone. It can cause them to back away from family, friends and loved ones. They may also feel hopeless at times. They may suddenly find it hard to do the things they once enjoyed. Since depression can be difficult to talk about, having support can make a difference in someone s life. Remember, it is important for a person with depression to get help from a doctor. A doctor can work with you to find a care plan that is best for you. If you think you might have depression, or if your doctor said you have it, you are not alone. The goal of Support Partners is to help you build a group of friends that can give you support. The program also offers useful tips for dealing with new depression experiences. Your chances of being healthy can really improve by making and keeping good social relationships. What is a Support Partner? A Support Partner is someone who is dedicated to helping you get well. This person can be someone to cheer you on or listen to you when you need them; he or she can support you and help you understand that you can get better from depression.if you think you might have depression, or if your doctor said you have it, there s no reason to feel alone. Support can be given in many different ways, depending on what you need. Some people A Support Partner is someone who is dedicated to helping you get well. 1 Introduction to Support Partners Introduction to Support Partners 2

4 may need a Support Partner to provide a safe place for talking about their feelings. Others might need help with daily chores. Anyone can be your Support Partner family, friends, co-workers, neighbors, spiritual leaders or others. How do I use this Guidebook? The Managing Your Depression guidebook gives step-by-step instructions for building a group to support you. Each step offers different tips, including how to see the signs and symptoms of depression. It will also teach you how to find a Support Partner. give you a chance to tell them about your personal experiences. It can also help you talk about your goals for getting better. You can also use the guidebook to help you find a doctor and decide on a long-term care plan. On top of that, the guidebooks provide more places to find information. This guidebook is one of three Support Partners guidebooks. Being a Support Partner was created to help your friend(s) learn how they can support you. You should give a copy to each of your Support Partners. Also, we strongly urge you and your Support Partner(s) to read the Shared Guidebook together. This guidebook can help you begin an important conversation about depression. The shared guidebook can 3 Introduction to Support Partners Introduction to Support Partners 4

5 STEP 1: Recognizing Depression What is Depression? Depression is a real illness and requires treatment. No one chooses to be depressed. One thought is that it is caused by not having enough of certain chemicals in the brain. Depression can make people feel and act differently. Everyone has a different experience with depression. It can start because of a single event or stress. It may also run in the family or it may have no outside cause at all. Also, when signs, or symptoms, don t all go away it is more likely to come back but getting well is possible. Nobody should settle for feeling only a little better. Most people with the illness get better with the right care. 5 Recognizing Depression Recognizing Depression 6

6 Depression has many signs, or symptoms: COMMON SYMPTOMS Emotional Physical Sadness throughout Fatigue or lack of energy the day, nearly every day Sleeping too much or too Loss of interest in, or little enjoyment of, your favorite Change in appetite or activities weight Feelings of worthlessness Trouble concentrating Excessive or inappropriate Restlessness feelings of guilt Feeling slowed down Thoughts of death or suicide Trouble making decisions themselves. That way, they can move forward with their lives. Symptoms that don t go away completely can hurt a person s chances of staying well. It may also increase the risk of symptoms coming back. Nobody should settle for feeling only a little better. Finding a doctor and sticking with treatment can help keep a person with depression on the road to wellness. On top of that, getting support from a friend or loved one can also help. Nobody should settle for feeling only a little better. Talk to a doctor if both of the following occur: Sadness or loss of interest close to every day for at least two weeks At least four other signs from the list above during the same two weeks The Goal of Treatment The goal of any care plan is to help people with depression get back to feeling and acting like 7 Recognizing Depression Recognizing Depression 8

7 STEP 2: Choosing a Support Partner The Power of Support Asking for a helping hand or shoulder to lean on does not need to make you feel embarrassed. It means that you are working hard to get better. In fact, having a Support Partner can have many benefits. A Support Partner can: Give you hope that you can get better Help you follow your progress See changes that may show your depression is coming back or getting worse Help you find a doctor Go to doctor visits with you 9 Choosing a Support Partner Choosing a Support Partner 10

8 Finding the Best Support Partner for You Use the tools on the next page to write down everyone you have a relationship with. You may already have someone you want to be your Support Partner. If not, making a list may help you think of someone. You may also want more than one Support Partner. If so, this list can help you think of all the people you can ask. Remember, it can be important to have a Support Partner, but they cannot replace help from a doctor. Tools to identify a Support Partner Among others, a Support Partner can be a: Spouse Playgroup moms/dads Life partner Spiritual leader Boyfriend or girlfriend Religious or spiritual Family member (mother, group father, sibling, aunt, Close colleague uncle, etc.), in-law Current or old neighbor Close friend Roommate Teacher/coach College or school friend PTA member Write your list here: 11 Choosing a Support Partner Choosing a Support Partner 12

9 After you ve made a list, fill in this chart to narrow down the people you know. Split them up based on their special skills and personalities. Fill in each part of this chart with the first few people that come to mind. Then, check if someone s name comes up more than once. He or she could be a great choice for a Support Partner. Potential Support Partners People I feel comfortable being honest with: Things to Think about before Choosing You now have an idea of who may be a good Support Partner. Next, you can start thinking about where you need support. You may need emotional support or maybe you need practical support. Thinking about what kind of support you need will help you choose the right Support Partner. Also, it is important to make sure that you choose someone who has enough time to help you. Avoid choosing someone who travels too often and won t always be reachable. People who are patient and understanding: People who will not judge me: People who I trust to keep my feelings private: 13 Choosing a Support Partner Choosing a Support Partner 14

10 If you re not sure what type of help you need, you might want to ask yourself these questions: Questions Set 1: 1. Do you feel lonely a lot? Y N 2. Do you hide your feelings and emotions? Y N 3. Do you wish you had someone to talk to about your feelings, but think no one will care or understand? Y N 4. Are you afraid to tell people that you have an illness and need someone you can be yourself with? Y N If you answered yes to most of these questions, you may need a Support Partner who can be there for you emotionally. Questions Set 2: What if You can t Think of Someone or You are Worried About Bothering People? Don t be nervous. There will always be people willing to support you; just open up your search. Take another look at your list and think about looking for support in unlikely places: Think about contacting local depression support groups. Check the Shared Guidebook for resources. Can your spiritual leader suggest anyone? What about asking your main doctor for some suggestions? Don t be nervous. There will always be people willing to support you. 1. Do you feel as though the stresses and chores of everyday life are too much to handle? Y N 2. Are you forgetting to do things at home or at work? Y N 3. Do you feel like you are not giving your children enough attention and everyday help? Y N If you answered yes to most of these questions, you may need a Support Partner who can provide practical help with errands or housekeeping. 15 Choosing a Support Partner Choosing a Support Partner 16

11 STEP 3: Asking for Support You ve found someone who may be able to support you. Now, it is time to ask for help. The truth is, we all need a little help once in a while. You may be surprised to learn that many people you know will be happy to help you some of them may have also had depression or know others who have it. Remember, depression is an illness. It may not go away without a care plan which may include support of family or friends. Maybe the thought of asking for support scares you. If so, you can ask your potential Support Partner to review the guidebooks with you as a first step. How to ask for Support If you re not sure how to begin, these might be some ways to start the conversation: You know I just got tired of feeling 17 Asking for Support Asking for Support 18

12 down all the time. I found a doctor who is be good to have someone around to help with Each person experiences depression differently and may need support in different helping me to live the life I really want. I d like to tell you about it Like a lot of other people, I have down days, but I m learning that I have depression and I need to work on my wellness a bit more than others I m thinking of going to see a doctor because I m not feeling like myself, and I would like to tell you about it I feel so lonely and overwhelmed lately. I think I need someone to talk to I know our relationship has been tense lately and My doctor says I have depression. I m getting treatment to help me feel better, but I think I will need support in the meantime everyday chores. It may be useful to have people who will lighten your load for a little while so you can focus on feeling better. What if Someone Says No? Some people may not be able to give you the time you need. Maybe they have work, family and other responsibilities. They may feel they can t devote enough time to be a good Support Partner. This does not mean they don t care about you; it just means they can t take on the extra responsibility right now. Look at their honesty as a sign of respect for you. Please understand that no was probably very hard for them to say. Look at their honesty as a sign of respect for you. Please understand that no was probably very hard for them to say. ways. Do You Need More than One Support Partner? Each person experiences depression differently and may need support in different ways. If you think you need a lot of support, you may want more than one Support Partner. If your first choice does not have a lot of free time, you might Remember, we can t know everything about each other s lives. Be nice to them and stay open to having a relationship with them. Down the road, times may be better for both of you. As a next step, look back at your list of possible Support Partners to choose someone else. also want to find extra Support Partners. It may 19 Asking for Support Asking for Support 20

13 STEP 4: Building a Partnership Learning about Depression Together While talking honestly with your Support Partner(s) about your feelings, you may run into misunderstandings or stereotypes. It is important to remember that depression is a real illness of the mind and body and most people need treatment to get better. There are many ways for you and your Support Partner to learn about the illness. For more information, go to You can also check the Shared Guidebook for additional resources. You may also want to ask your Support Partner to go to a doctor visit with you. This can give them a chance to get some advice on how they can help you. It can also be a good time to discuss any of their fears or concerns with your doctor. 21 Building a Partnership Building a Partnership 22

14 Be very specific about the things you would like help with. Also let them know the things you can handle on your own. How can Your Support Partner Help You? Now that you have started a conversation about depression with your Support Partner, you can start to figure out how they can best help you. Since you ve already thought about the support you need practical and/or emotional you can be open and clear about your needs. Be very specific about the things you would like help with. Also let them know the things you can handle on your own. This will help your Support Partner. It will set clear boundaries for your future partnership. These are some examples of emotional and practical support to consider. Use the extra space to note your specific needs. Emotional Support: Call me every night to check in Get together with me once a week Help me spot my depression signs and the things that set them off Cheer me on to stick with my care plan Help me follow my progress Help me set real short-term goals, if suggested by my doctor Push me to stay as active as possible Emotional vs. Practical Support 23 Building a Partnership Building a Partnership 24

15 Practical vs. Emotional Support Practical Support: Help me make an appointment with my doctor Drive me to doctors appointments Help me pick my kids up from school or after-school activities Setting Future Goals Having a Support Partner to help with everyday tasks can be a big help. Sharing this load will let you focus on getting well. However, you and your Support Partner need to make a plan that will help you eventually take over these tasks. Working toward, and reaching each goal, can help you on the road to recovery. Help me with health care paperwork Help me cook dinner once in a while Run errands with me Arrange a time to walk or go to the gym with me Make a date to go to the movies with me 25 Building a Partnership Building a Partnership 26

16 STEP 5: Managing Your Depression Seeking Help from a Doctor If you haven t already, contact a doctor to talk about your depression. Include your Support Partner in this process. If you need to, ask your Support Partner to help you find a doctor. You can also ask them to go to an appointment with you. For more information on how to find a doctor, check the Shared Guidebook. Mapping out a Care Plan One thing you can do with your Support Partner is to decide on a care plan together. You can then work together to reach care goals. The first step for doing this is to create a care plan. Your Support Partner can help you figure out your care plan. They can also cheer you on along the way. But, only you can choose your goals and work to reach them. To create a care plan, look at the 27 Managing Your Depression Managing Your Depression 28

17 Mapping out a care plan A care plan can help you: Decide on goals (if goal-setting is approved by your doctor) Figure out things or specific times that may cause your depression to get worse Outline a care plan that can be used to move beyond the illness Make a list of early signs that may mean that depression is coming back Shared Guidebook. It will show you ways to get started and specific examples. It can also help you find a doctor and decide on a long-term care plan. Depression and Suicide As someone with depression, it is important that you understand the relationship between the illness and suicide. Suicide is when someone takes their own life. Not all people with depression think about suicide. Also, not all suicidal thoughts lead to people taking their own life. If you ever think about ending your life, you should seek medical help immediately. If you can t reach your doctor, go to the nearest emergency room. You can call 911 or the National Suicide Prevention Hotline, SUI- CIDE. Help is available day or night. There may be times when your symptoms get worse. These may be times when you start to think about taking your own life. Contact your doctor immediately if you feel your depression symptoms are getting worse. Also, call right away if you begin to think of suicide. Contact your doctor immediately if you see any unusual changes in your behavior or if you have other concerns. Never wait to get in touch with your doctor if you are worried. Look at the Shared Guidebook to learn more about where to find help from support groups, as well as mental health agencies. Holding the Hope Feeling more like yourself can take time. Even when you are taking a medicine, going to talk One of the best things you can do with your Support Partner is to decide on a plan together. You can then work together to reach care goals. The first step for doing this is to create a care plan. 29 Managing Your Depression Managing Your Depression 30

18 therapy or both. There may be days when you feel that getting well is impossible. This is not Feeling more like yourself can take time. This is true even when you are taking a medicine, going to talk therapy or both. unusual. Your Support Partner can help you to not lose hope. Ask your Support Partner to remind you that things will get better. Ask them to remind you to stick with your care plan. Also, make sure to talk with your doctor if you re not getting better. Keeping a Diary It is important that you stick with the care plan your doctor recommends. You should also keep track of how the plan is working. One way to do this is to keep a diary. If you don t feel up to it, your Support Partner may be able do this with you. You can take it over later, when you begin to feel better. If you share your diary with your Support Partner, they can cheer you on as you start to feel better. Your Support Partner can also watch for signs that your symptoms may be coming back. Think about your depression symptoms as you and your Support Partner write in your diary. Write as little or as much as you want, which could include things like: How did you sleep last night? Did you feel hopeless at any point today? Did anything special occur today that was hard to deal with? How was your energy level? Did you feel overwhelmed? Did you have any pain? What were some things you just couldn t deal with doing today? What do you wish you had the energy for/interest in today? Remember to keep track of the progress you 31 Managing Your Depression Managing Your Depression 32

19 Remember to keep track of the progress you have made. Also pay attention to the things that show that you are getting back to being yourself, such as what things were you able to do today? have made. Also pay attention to the things that show that may show you are getting back to being yourself, such as: Did you eat well today? What things were you able to do today? Did you go to therapy/take your medicine today? What did you feel you were able to get done today? What did you do today that you wouldn t have done before? Setting Goals Once you start to feel a little better, setting goals can be an important part of getting well. But, you should first make sure your doctor says it is okay to set goals. Your Support Partner can help you remember things you used to enjoy or do well. With time and work, you can enjoy these things again. Share your list with your Support Partner so they can cheer you on as you reach your goals. These goals will be very personal, but here are some ideas to start you off: Potential Goals: I would like to: Get my garden looking good again Have a day when I don t feel overwhelmed at work Meet with my book club again Have my family over for a Sunday barbecue Get back into my weekly bike ride Meet friends for lunch Join the bowling league again Taking Care of Yourself You wouldn t run a race the day after having surgery. Getting better from depression can also take time. Remember, your Support Partner is there to help you, but you need to take care of yourself, as well. Take care of yourself by eating well, getting enough rest and getting exercise. Talk to your doctor before starting an exercise plan. Remember to think positively and let go of negative thoughts. 33 Managing Your Depression Managing Your Depression 34

20 NOTES: NOTES: 35 NOTES NOTES 36