Date Night Questions

Transcription

1 Looking Back Too often we get so caught up in the hectic pace of day-to-day life that we don t take time to think back to where our relationship first began. The questions in this section will help you remember what it was like when your relationship first started. Take some time as you go through these questions. Allow both of you the opportunity to answer. Don t feel like you have to rush through all the questions. There is no rule that says you have to do all the questions in a certain amount of time. So sit with your spouse and reminisce, laugh, shed a tear but look back to where it all began. The Early Days: 1. Describe when you first met. Where were you? How did you feel when you first talked? What did you think about your future spouse? 2. What was it like leading up to your first date? 3. Where did you go and what did you do on your first date? 4. What memory of that first date stands out to you? 5. How did you feel about the other person after that first date? 6. When did you begin to realize that this relationship might be something different and special? 7. Did you both realize this could be a special relationship at the same or different times? 8. When did you know that you loved your future spouse? 9. When was the first time you told them you loved them? Getting Ready for the Big Day: 1. When did you start to think about marrying your spouse? 2. [Husband] What did you do to prepare to pop the question? 3. [Wife] Did you know that he was going to ask you to marry him? 4. [Husband] What was your plan for proposing to her? 5. [Wife] Did the proposal go according to the plan? 6. How long did you date before you were married? 7. What are some memories you have of preparing for your wedding? 8. Think about the people in your wedding party. Who were they and where are they now? Do you still connect with them? 9. Where did you do on your honeymoon? The Good Ol Days: 1. What was your first home or apartment? Describe it. 2. What was your combined household income your first year of marriage? 3. How many jobs have you both had during your marriage? 4. What was your favorite job? 5. What was your worst job? 6. Was there anything or anyone that drove a wedge between you early on? 7. When did you begin to talk and plan for children? 8. Describe what it felt like when you first realized you were pregnant and were going to have a child. 9. What memories funny or serious do you have about that first pregnancy? 10. What emotions did you have the moment your first child was born?

2 Looking Back - continued - The Busy Days: 1. What was the best thing about being a parent? 2. What was the hardest thing about being a parent? 3. Do you believe that the days go slow and the years go fast? How so? 4. What was the best thing you did as a parent? 5. If you could have one do over with your kids, what would it be? The Hard Days: 1. Share the toughest season of your marriage. What did you learn from this? 2. Was there a way this tough season could have been avoided? 3. What lessons did God teach you as you went through this time? 4. How are you stronger as a couple because of what you have gone through together? 5. If you could share one piece of advice to couples just getting married what would it be? The Important Days: 1. When did you come to faith in Christ? 2. Who played a significant role in your faith journey? 3. If you drew a chart of your spiritual growth over the years, what would it look like? 4. What is your favorite verse in the Bible? 5. Which character in the Bible do you most identify with? 6. Do you remember a sermon that profoundly impacted your life?

3 Looking Ahead Many times life is so busy and hectic that we do well to just survive each day. We fall, exhausted, into bed at night knowing that our family has been fed, clothed, schooled, homeworked, and bathed. We don t have the time or strength to think about the future. The questions in this section will help you and your spouse think about your future together. As you go through these questions, allow each of you the opportunity to answer. Don t feel like you have to rush through all the questions. There is no rule that says you have to do all the questions or complete them in a certain amount of time. So sit with your spouse and think, plan, and dream about what God may have in store for your relationship. Dreaming: 1. At this point in your life, which would you choose to make your life better: better physical health, better relationships, more money, a different job? Why did you choose the one you did? Does your spouse agree? 2. What would you do if you didn t have to work for a living? 3. You must choose four all expenses paid vacations to take with your spouse: most romantic, most fun, most adventurous, and most relaxing. Where would you go for each? 4. If you could take lessons and become an expert in anything, what would it be? Why? 5. Describe your dream house. Where would it be located? What would it look like? Prioritizing: 1. What would you do with your spouse for the next ten years if you knew they would be your last? 2. If your spouse were to give you a grade on how well or how often you encourage them, what would that grade be? 3. If you were able to spend one entire day alone with your spouse, how would you spend it? 4. Name two or three dreams you and your spouse have for the empty-nesting years. Where will you live? Where will you visit? How will you be serving God? What will retirement look like? 5. If you and your spouse were to grow in your walk with God, what is one thing that you would have to start doing together? What would you need to stop doing? Parenting: 1. What qualities and values do you want your children to have when they leave your home? 2. What dreams do you have for each of your kids? 3. How are you intentionally building up each child? 4. What specifically are you praying for each of your children on a daily basis right now? 5. What are your children learning and seeing in you about having a heart for God and others? Concluding: 1. What are three activities or experiences you want to accomplish or participate in before you die? Why? 2. How would you like your family and friends to describe you at your funeral? Are there changes you need to make? 3. I f you were to die tonight, do you believe that you would go to heaven? Why or why not? 4. If you were to die and stand before God and He asked you, Why should I allow you into heaven? What would your answer be to Him?

4 Looking Within Often we are so worried with other people that we forget to stop and take a look at ourselves. The questions in this section will help you and your spouse talk about those things that you rarely think about and almost never talk about your inmost thoughts and fears. As you go through these questions, allow both of you the opportunity to answer. Don t feel like you have to rush through all the questions. There is no rule that says you have to do all the questions or complete them in a certain amount of time. So sit with your spouse, open up, and share with them some of your most cherished and exclusive thoughts. Where I came from: 1. Describe the home you grew up in. Where was it? Who lived there? 2. What was it like growing up in your family? 3. What is one thing that was true about you growing up that you hid, and maybe still hide today? 4. If you could go back and give advice to yourself at 15 years old, what advice would you give? 5. What is one tradition you had as a child that you still carry on today? 6. What is one tradition you had as a child that you do not carry on today? Who I was: 1. Describe your most mischievous moment before you met your spouse. 2. What words would your mom or dad use to describe you when you were in junior high? 3. My favorite song/movie/book when I was in high school was 4. My most embarrassing moment growing up was 5. Before I became a Christian I would be described as Who I m becoming: 1. One skill or ability I am seeking to improve in is 2. One area of our married life I am trying to improve in is 3. Recently, God has been teaching me 4. One change that I need to enact in my life right now is 5. Sometimes, I wish that I would What I fear: 1. My greatest fear for the future is 2. My greatest fear for our relationship is 3. The thing I m most scared about for our children is 4. The thing I have the most anxiety over for our country is 5. I m most nervous about What I hope for: 1. The thing I hope most for our marriage is 2. My greatest hope for our children is 3. The one thing I m most looking forward to in heaven is 4. One thing I hope that we get to experience together is

5 Looking to God We fill life with many things. So many things, in fact, that we often neglect the most important relationship our relationship with God. The great thing about God is that He wants everyone to know Him (1 Timothy 2:4). As you go through these questions, share with your spouse where you ve been, where you are, and where you hope to grow in your relationship with God. Don t feel like you have to rush through all the questions. There is no rule that says you have to do all the questions or complete them in a certain amount of time. Don t forget to pause and thank God for His faithfulness, forgiveness, and patience. Looking Back: 1. What are your first memories of God or church? 2. Who was someone who first taught you about God? 3. As a young adult, how would you describe your relationship with God? 4. Share about a time when you were angry or doubted God. 5. Describe an experience growing up when you felt that God was close to you. Looking Within: 1. What is one thing God has been working on in your life lately? 2. Describe one habit or discipline you consistently engage in to know God and His Word better. 3. Share one area where you are better, more mature, or more disciplined in your walk with God today than you were one year ago. 4. What is the one area that you are currently struggling with in your spiritual life? 5. The verse from the Bible that God is using in my life right now is Looking Ahead: 1. If we couldn t see each other for one month, the one area in my walk with God in which I d like you to notice positive change is 2. One thing I would like for us to do together to strengthen our relationship with God is 3. The one fruit of the Spirit that I feel I need to grow in is (Ephesians 5:22: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control) 4. One area that I d like to get involved in serving at church is 5. A prayer I would love for God to answer is Looking Out: 1. If we were to give ourselves a grade on how well we reach out to others with God s love it would be 2. One thing we have done intentionally that showed our kids we have a heart for our neighborhood is 3. Who is one person you pray will come to know God? 4. Who is one person you have talked to about God recently? 5. If you didn t have to work and money and time were no object, what one thing would you do to share God with the world?