10 Common Tapping Mistakes (and how to avoid them!)

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2 10 Common Tapping Mistakes (and how to avoid them!) Brought to you by: This guide will help you whether you ve been tapping a while or if you are new to it and You haven t been doing it that much perhaps because you re not getting the results you want You ve thrown up your hands and decided that this doesn t work for you You just tap half-heartedly without getting those results and you re wondering what s going on There are some really common mistakes many people make in their tapping practice. These might be things you may not even know about or have considered. Some of these may be simple things that you have forgotten even if you did learn how to properly tap, depending on how and when you learned. If you haven t had a comprehensive training, some of these things might even be new to you! We have created this to fill in a few of these missing pieces that are important to getting solid results. It is our hope that you ll get some inspiration and new perspectives on this. If you haven t been getting the results you want, it s likely that you have been missing some of these because truly, tapping does work. We can t stress that enough. And you may have had some successes, small or large, or perhaps you haven t had success yet and you re wondering if this even works for you. In any case, these common mistakes may be the keys to your success!

3 Legal Disclaimer The information contained in this report, including ideas, suggestions, techniques, and other materials, is educational in nature and is provided only as general information and is not medical or psychological advice. By viewing this report, you agree to fully release, indemnify, and hold harmless, The Tapping Resource Plus from any claim or liability whatsoever and for any damage or injury, personal, financial, emotional, psychological or otherwise, which you may incur arising at any time out of or in relation to your use of the information presented in this report. By continuing to explore this report, you agree to all of the above. 10 Most Common Tapping Mistakes Mistakes may not be the most accurate term, since they may simply be oversights, things you don t know about, or have just gotten out of the habit of doing. They are really more like areas of focus that can be missed or misunderstood. Here are what we have found to be the 10 most common tapping mistakes: 1. Not rating your work 2. Not learning more 3. Being too general (not specific enough) 4. Giving up too soon not being persistent enough 5. Not clearing all the aspects 6. Not taking notes and keeping track 7. Not getting to the root of the issue 8. Not getting support 9. Using positive words too soon (or, why we use negative wording) 10. Forgetting to tap (on everything and anything)

4 1. Not rating your work Part of the tapping process includes rating your issue on a scale (from 0 to 10 intensity or by using some other scale). The whole point of this is to give you a baseline so that you can retake the measurement afterward to see if anything has changed. A lot of people just skip this step; in fact, you wouldn t believe how common this is! Even experienced practitioners forget or neglect to do this! How are you going to know if you are getting results if you didn t get a baseline rating? There are a few challenges that tend to happen with respect to rating: FORGETTING It s very common for people to forget to rate themselves. They just start tapping on something in the moment. While there s nothing wrong with just tapping this way it s great to do this as needed it s really best if you can rate it before and after. Sometimes you get into a groove and you re tapping and you get results, but try to remember to take that little nanosecond to tune into yourself, take a rating on a scale from 0 to 10 before you start the work. Get clear on what you want to work on and then rating it will help you gain some clarity. You just need to rate the specific issue that you re working on both before and after tapping. Otherwise, how else are you really going to know that you ve cleared it? Also, since it is very easy and normal to jump from aspect to aspect, unless you ve noticed the number before, you are unlikely to notice that it has changed or shifted aspects. Rating is an important way to keep track and getting into the habit of doing it every time will improve your practice and ideally, your results.

5 RATING SCALE ISSUES It s possible that you just haven t found a rating scale that works for you. Or perhaps you find it difficult to rate something. This is not as uncommon as you might think. In this case, see if you can come up with something different. Maybe you re not a numbers person. Some people who are comfortable with rating this way get very specific and come up with numbers like 6.3! While this may be a bit extreme, many people are fine with identifying a number rating. For others, choosing a number may be a struggle. Generally, most people have some sense of how intense it is. One option is to guess this works quite well. Another option is to ask yourself, how do I know it s a 6? Well, maybe your heart is racing, or maybe you feel some throbbing in your knee, or maybe you just have a sense that it s a 6. All of these are correct ways of rating. They are all excellent ways to judge something as a 6 or an 8 or whatever. Trust your knowing about how to rate something. If the scale doesn t work for you, try a different way. You may have a sense that it s small, medium or large. You might just notice or feel that it s medium-sized and it s getting smaller. Or it may be that to you the issue gets farther away or closer. For some people it s like that. Other people like colours. You might imagine a colour scale if that works for you. Maybe from white to black or with colours in the middle, or may be red-hot to cool blue - whatever really works for you. Children also respond to colours. You can also use intensities, almost like a sound volume of high, medium and low. Use any system that works for you. Try some out if you do have trouble rating.

6 TUNING INTO THE WRONG ISSUE Another reason rating can be a challenge is if you are rating the wrong issue. This may be related to something called shifting aspects. We will talk a little about aspects later in this guide so you have an understanding of it. This may be the case if you find that you keep tapping on something and the number doesn t go down. PERFECTIONISM AND GETTING STUCK Another problem around rating is getting stuck on a number. We ve stressed the importance of rating your issue, but while you do need to rate your intensity, you need to hold it lightly. Some people get very attached to needing to find a number for this. If that s the case, if you are the kind of person who really gets stressed out about finding the right number, needing do it right or perfectly, then it s also important to not be too attached to it. Let s say, for example, that you are working on something and you ve got it down to a 3 and you cannot budge it down to a 0. Depending on the background that you have with tapping, you may have learned that everything needs to get to a 0 or you may have heard that it must get to a 0 or else it didn t work. That isn t necessarily a black-and-white truth. It s also important not to get too stuck on the numbers because it can also hold back your progress. If you are really stuck on it you can go back to it. You may be able to get at it from a different angle which is perfectly okay. Sometimes an issue might be quite complex with many different parts to it, so it s fine if you only get down to a stubborn 3 or 4 on some big limiting core belief.

7 Underneath that limiting core belief there might be ten different parts that are keeping it stuck in place. It s probably not going to budge below a 4 until you clear more of the pieces. After a while it will start to budge. Because of this possibility, try not to get too stuck on your numbers. If you re really stuck, just take a guess and let it go. Then notice it again at the end. This will help you notice if you ve made progress and gives you further information regardless of the number. CAN T FULLY ACCESS THE FEELING Sometimes, depending on the issue, it can be hard to give something a number. Sometimes you just know something is in there, but you can t seem to fully access it. As a result, it s a little hard to give it a number. In this case, sometimes as you tap a little more, the emotion or feeling will start to rise to the surface so that you can access it. In this case, you can just notice if it is small, medium, or large or you can call it low, medium, high, or even give it a colour. If you can think of a system that will work for you that will give you an indicator of something increasing or decreasing so that you can get a gauge from before and after, we really recommend doing that. 2. Not learning more Where and how did you learn to tap? Did you learn by tapping along with YouTube videos, audios, or by reading a book? Perhaps you attended an introductory talk on tapping or visited an EFT Tapping Practitioner. Maybe you even trained in a Level 1 EFT tapping training. Do you believe that you know how to tap and are proficient at it? Did you know that there is much more to learn?

8 This is a huge mistake people make! You ve likely only scratched the surface of EFT tapping! Most people think that once they learn the very basics that they know how to tap. This is such a shame and sometimes turns people away from tapping when they think they know how to do it, try it, and do not get the results they expected. This is one of the most frustrating things that EFT Tapping Practitioners hear from clients and the public! As you probably know, tapping can be used for so many things. And if you don t know that, maybe you have only been using tapping for one or two things like anxiety or grief. Did you know that tapping can be used for physical pain? Or maybe you ve only been using it for physical pain; did you know it can be used for trauma, or that it can be used for fears and phobia? There s surrogate tapping for animals and children. The possibilities for tapping are really endless, so if you are not aware of some of these things, do learn more. There s a lot more to it than you may think! It s also important to understand the process of tapping and to know that there are very, very rarely one minute wonders. They don t happen that often and that s okay. It is still a highly effective and efficient technique when learned and applied correctly and persistently. HOW TO LEARN MORE When considering how to learn more, your choices depends on whether you would like to learn how to tap on yourself or if you want to tap on others. For an overview of how to learn more, please see this video: 3 Steps to Learn EFT Tapping. The links mentioned in the video are all available on The Tapping

9 Resource Plus website here. We also offer a free mini-course to get you started that is a little more in-depth than what you may have already learned. You will have received access to this mini-course when you received this report! 3. Being too general (not specific enough) If you work too globally or generally with your issue, the tapping will likely not work well or it may take a long time. That s because there are so many sub-issues to it that you might not even be aware of yet. There are ways to get to that! With tapping, what you want to do is try to choose the most specific piece or little part of it that you can and to work on each small piece at a time. This isn t always the easiest thing to do, because sometimes we have a series of things, or they are all interconnected, or we only see the one really big issue instead of the supporting parts. Issues can be really challenging that way, and picking once specific thing to tap on may seem too insignificant or tedious. In the case where the issue is too big, we recommend that you write it down on a piece of paper and just start breaking it down as best you can. The process of breaking an issue down into parts and pieces is an excellent habit and if you can see it visually in front of you on a page, then it may make it easier to work through each one at a time. An example might be something like: I m having a problem with my kids or I m having a problem with my husband or I have a weight problem These are all way too general. You might get some results using this global approach, but it s

10 highly unlikely that you ll get satisfying and permanent results if you approach it this way. With any of these types of issues, even though it feels like it is one single issue, it s almost always a basket of issues when you start to unpack it. Doing that unpacking or deconstructing of an issue takes some practice; it often takes some guidance. Part of it may involve asking questions and mapping out issues. One way is to work with an EFT Tapping Practitioner who can help you sort through those issues. They will be able to help you find the single tappable pieces that you can work on yourself. So if you say for example, I hate my job. That s pretty big. You might feel really strongly about that. To break it down, you might ask yourself, What exactly do I hate about my job? Why do I hate my job? What parts of my job do I hate and what parts are okay? You could even get out of piece of paper and break it down a little. Do I hate my coworkers? Do I hate the hours? Do I hate the stress level? What specifically do I hate? What experiences have happened that I ve disliked? The key is to get really detailed or specific. Of that list then choose one of those things or events. From that list, see if you can break it down even more. If you say I hate the hours, then think about what exactly it is that you hate about the hours. Do you hate that it keeps you from your kids? Do you hate that you have to get up so early? Do you hate that they always ask you for over time? This narrows it down even further and you can choose one of these to tap on at a time. The more you can break it down, the better results you will get. This is because you can go back and address each piece little by little. The process works so quickly and easily that you can simply go back and treat each little piece. That s

11 how you ll get the best results! Don t worry if you have an enormous list. Tap through each piece as you have time; just keep working through the list. Tapping tends to work quickly, so you can work your way through that list within a very reasonable amount of time. Also, there s a phenomenon called the Generalization Effect that happens, so it s more likely than not that you won t need to tap on every single piece you have listed. Besides, this is one of the fastest and most effective techniques that we ve experienced. Being specific and jotting things down are so important in getting permanent, measurable results with EFT tapping. Not getting specific enough is the number one reason why people believe tapping doesn t work. 4. Giving up too soon not being persistent enough People think that they can just go sit and tap for 20 minutes and then if their issue doesn t completely go away, they think, well, that didn t work. That s not quite how EFT tapping works. The bottom line is that you need to be persistent. This is another of the most common mistakes people make. They give up way too soon and do not continue to tap on their issue if they don t get immediate results. Even if you ve taken an issue and broken it down into smaller sub-issues, then you need to stay with it and choose one of those things and tap it through, and then the next day choose another one and tap it through, and so on. Be persistent with it, because you will get results if you keep with it.

12 Sometimes it does take a while depending on the issue and its roots. There are occasional one-minute wonders or 20-minute wonders which are wonderful, but the results you can get from regular tapping are profound. People who get consistently amazing results are usually very persistent with the work. How often are you tapping? Is it enough? Do you do it regularly? You don t need to tap daily, but some people do. Or you might go through times when you tap a lot, and others where you don t tap at all. Maybe you tap every day on something that s really bothering you for a couple of weeks. Or perhaps you tap a little bit each day on something that you knew was a big issue that you ve broken down into pieces and you clear a little piece day by day until you re getting at the root of it. That s awesome. That might take you a week, a month But then maybe there s a period where you don t tap in between. That s fine too. After an intensive period of tapping, it may be useful to take a break from it and let all the processing percolate through your system. The bottom line is to understand that it may take some time to clear your issues and that it is completely normal for that to happen, but to keep at it until they clear. 5. Not clearing all the aspects Now let s move on to something called aspects, which are the parts and pieces of an issue. Here s an example of what aspects are. Let s say you have an issue with your husband that you describe as:

13 My husband is driving me crazy. Let s break that down into more specific pieces, or aspects. One way to do this is to ask questions about the original issue. In this example, you might ask something like: What s bothering you about him? He s bothering me because he spends money without telling me. I m a saver and he is a spender. This gives you more specific information. From here, you keep asking questions to get even more into the details. Why does that bother you? What specifically about that bothers you? Maybe it makes me feel unsafe. Maybe I m worried about our financial future. Maybe I feel like he doesn t respect my wishes with our joint money. That s a whole bunch of things. Now out of those issues that came up, pick one. Let s say you choose this one: I don t feel he respects my desire to save money. You may decide to start working on that. Chances are that there may be a lot of aspects to that! When you start working on one, it might remind you of a whole bunch of other things. It might open up memories connected with it that need to be cleared. Those are some of the aspects that you can tap on. You need to identify those or else they ll still be looming in the background. Until you can clean out all of the aspects about something it may still keep running in the background of your life, influencing your decisions and thoughts.

14 In this example, I don t feel he respects my desire to save money; some of the aspects might be things like: A memory of the time he made fun of me in front of his friends when I brought lunch to an event because he thought it was so cheap He spends money out of our joint account without asking me even though I have asked him to discuss it with me He tells me I m too much when I use coupons for things These are just some examples of how an issue may get broken down into its components. Here s another example. Let s say you ve got a fear of spiders. This is not uncommon. So you start tapping on even though I have this fear of spiders. That s okay, but it still may be a bit too general. What is it about spiders that bother you so much? Try to pinpoint the attributes of spiders or what you notice about spiders that trouble you. By doing that, you will begin to describe the aspects. Some aspects around a fear of spiders might be memories. Perhaps you remember when you were four and your brother put a spider on your head and it scared you and surprised you. Tap through and clear the memory and notice what changes. If you think about spiders again and you are still feeling fear, you keep naming everything that bothers you about them and then tap on each part and piece until you check in with the thought of spiders and there is no fear left at all.

15 If you get it to that point, that s great. But then someone brings in a spider and you think you re going to be okay with it until you see the spider move with those creepy little legs. And you notice that you still have intensity around this and some fear. You hadn t considered the movement part of this spider phobia or fear. That s an aspect! That is one other piece of the problem. It s the sight of the spider moving. What about seeing a spider out of the corner of your eye? Or being surprised by a spider? Or maybe the feeling of the spider on your skin? These are all aspects. Hopefully your issue doesn t have seemingly endless aspects. If an issue seems to be stubborn, then it s quite likely that there are other parts and pieces that you need to address. Finding those aspects takes a bit of detective work. That s where you do need to learn more about tapping, or you need to work with an EFT Practitioner if you don t seem to be able to find them yourself. Sometimes we need some objectivity or questions from another person. If you find that an issue doesn t seem to be clearing, and you know that there probably more aspects to uncover, you ll need to dig a little deeper. One tip to doing this is to consider your senses. If you have a memory that is not fully clearing, for example, something that has to do with a family member when you were a child, it might be something as simple as the expression on their face. This look on my father s face when he looked at me a certain way. Or maybe the sound or tone of their voice, the sound of a fist pounding on a table, or the specific phrase they would say when they chastised you or screamed at you. All of these can be aspects. You can clear any of these with tapping. Not clearing all the aspects is a very common mistake or oversight that tappers make. Unless you have been trained in EFT Tapping through a certifying workshop, it s quite likely that you would not have learned how to do this properly.

16 If the problem keeps recurring and you have been tapping on it, and it doesn t seem to clear, this could be the real issue not clearing all of the aspects. Of course it could also be due to other issues covered here in the Common Mistakes, but this is something practitioners recognize as one of the biggies! 6. Not taking notes and keeping track There are so many tappers, both new and experienced, who neglect to take any notes and/or journal about the work they are doing. They don t write down the results they ve gotten, they don t keep track of progress, and they don t write down the insights they have received from their self-tapping sessions. Sometimes, when you are in the middle of working on yourself, you have a clear realization about what else needs to be worked on. If you don t capture that on paper, chances are pretty slim that you ll remember it. If you do start to write down notes, you will really start to notice a difference. It doesn t have to be extensive or detailed. Just jotting down the issue you re working on and the aspects you ve identified as well as ratings before and after can be enough. Insights and identifying other tappable parts including memories that pop up while you are tapping, are an added bonus if you also write these down! Another way notetaking helps is that sometimes when you start tapping, you may notice that occasionally you go all over the place. You may go from piece to piece, from here to there, this emotion, that emotion it can get confusing! Unless you jot those down, it s unlikely that you re going to go back to each one of those parts that came up. How are you going to remember all of those? Some people have a knack for remembering all the touched-upon areas, but most people don t, so writing it down is a very simple way to keep track of what you re doing.

17 Sometimes when you tap you identify a pattern or core issue or you get a glimpse into a new way of seeing the problem. These aha! moments can help you gain powerful new perspectives about something you ve been trying to address. It s useful to capture that in writing so that you can go back to it, because otherwise you may forget. Another reason to take notes is that sometimes you ll have an idea come to you about the next action or step you need to take to get you out of this thing, this pain, this problem, this particular situation. This happens frequently! If you don t write it down, you might forget or lose it. One of the most important reasons for keeping notes is something called the Apex Effect, or what we like to call Problem Amnesia. It s common and well documented in the tapping world. The idea is that once you tap on something and it s clear, you tend to forget that it was ever a problem! This really does happen! Having notes about it will show you the issues that you ve already worked through, because it s possible that after tapping, they become such non-issues that you forget they were ever a problem. Keeping notes also helps you to keep sight of your progress. Sometimes, if you ve got a big chronic issue that you are working on, it s easy to lose sight of progress because you might not be getting that problem to a zero. For example, there was a man who had issues that always affected his stomach. His stomach was his constant source of discomfort and pain; it was a very sensitive place. It was kind of his go to place any time he experienced stress. He made a lot of progress on the problem with tapping. He still had occasional bouts of digestion issues, and when this happened, he would fall into thinking that he wasn t getting anywhere with the tapping because the issue sometimes reemerged.

18 What he hadn t realized until he looked at his notes was that when he began, he was having stomach issues on average 5 or 6 days a week and it was really hard because he was limited in his diet and experienced quite a bit of discomfort. When he did have pain every week, often it went up to 7 or 8 intensity. After several months of self-tapping, it was actually only a problem maybe 10 to 15% of the time. And when it was a problem, the intensity only went up to a 4 or 5. Had he not documented that, he still would have thought I have this problem and tapping hasn t done anything. Going from 4 or 5 days a week to once every 2 weeks or so is quite a significant improvement! Some might even argue that it s amazing. Finally, when you keep track of your work, it gives you an opportunity to notice your victories! It s a chance to celebrate the self-work you have done. Otherwise it s easy to forget. You might look back proudly notice that: Hey! I cleared all that! And if you have a regular practice, you ll start to accumulate so many victories that you ll be able to celebrate often! In summary, taking some notes gives you more perspective, a place to gather insights, and a tool to help you remember and to celebrate. We can t recommend this practice enough. 7. Not getting to the root of the issue A common mistake that happens for both new and experienced tappers is that they don t always keep digging to get to the real root of their issue.

19 This often happens when people tap on physical issues. They get so focused on the physical aspect of it that they forget about the potential contributors and other emotions connected to the pain. For example, if you have a pain in your back, you might feel frustrated or sad about it, or maybe it s keeping you from doing the things you love to do. You can tap on all of those things. But it s also really useful to ask yourself, if this were an emotion what would it be? Or, is there any emotion that might be a contributing factor? Some other questions that could help you dig deeper might be: What was happening at the time that this started? Was there some kind of stress or something else going on? Did you experience or witness something? These kinds of questions help you to explore a bit about what was happening at the time the problem began and to treat that, because that will help you to start to get to the root of the problem as opposed to just the surface part of this pain in my back. Even if the doctor has given you a diagnosis that this is indeed a physical problem, it doesn t mean that there are not emotional pieces to it. There are likely some emotional pieces that could potentially be holding it stuck in place so that it won t heal. Another common piece of this is that so often people think that they are dealing with a really simple problem, but it turns out that it is actually quite complex. This is more common than not. A good rule of thumb is to treat all problems as

20 though they are complex ones. It then becomes a matter of getting down and seeing if there is more to this, in other words, if there are deeper roots. If you want to just tap on the surface at first, that s fine. Surface tapping, in this case, refers to only tapping on this pain in my back and not going any deeper than that. If you are not getting results, that s when you need to start looking deeper. That s when you need to start exploring to find the roots. This is most effectively done by asking yourself more questions about it. It s like doing research on your issue. You may need to kind of sit with it and observe it. It s not about explaining it or understanding it, but more about poking around internally to see if you can identify or recognize any contributing factors or origins of it, or anything that it might be connected to. This may include any memories or other feelings going on about it, or any beliefs that you might have about it. It s about deconstructing this issue into its pieces and really getting down to notice the fundamental driver beneath all of it. Here s one simple tool to do some exploration on an issue. While you are tapping on yourself, follow your issue with the word because. For example, perhaps you can t sleep. As you are tapping through your points, you could try saying I can t sleep because and then just leave space open for any information that comes to you. You may have an insight, you may not get any information, or you may get a little piece of information. It s all fine. It s about exploring it. Maybe you can t sleep because you have a lot on your mind. Well then take that statement and also follow it by because. I have a lot on my mind because and then fill in that blank and keep tapping on the next point. I have a lot on my mind because I have issues with my children. I have issues with my children because I m being a helicopter mom. I m being a helicopter mom because Because I m so afraid that I m not doing a good job as a mom. I m

21 so afraid I m not doing a good job as a mom because I feel like a failure inside. I feel like a failure inside because Because I feel like a failure inside. I feel like a failure inside because That s what my father used to tell me. Okay, bang! You may have just hit a root issue. That may not be the best example, but it is one example of how you can dig deeper to see what is underneath there. As you may have already heard in the notetaking and journaling section, you should also jot an insight like that down. It s nice to tap as you are doing that because it has a way of unlocking anything that s holding it in place and it also may help you get some clarity about your issue. 8. Not getting support A huge mistake that most tappers make is not getting support. Some EFT Tapping Practitioners are even guilty of this! By support, we mean having sessions with an experienced EFT Tapping Practitioner. This is not to say that you can only get results by seeing a practitioner, but if you are going to do self-work with tapping, it is really important to make sure that you are safe and can get help when you need it. Some people believe that they should be able to do it all on their own without any help. When you are dealing with traumatic events, it is crucial to make sure that you work with someone experienced to help guide you through it so that you can remain safe. It is important to get support if and when: You are having a hard time getting results You know you have some issues that are pretty intense

22 You feel overwhelmed by your issues and don t know where to begin You have a history of mental health issues in this case, be sure to see a mental health professional first, even before seeing an EFT Tapping Practitioner (or find a psychologist or registered counselor who is also an EFT Practitioner) You have experienced trauma that you would like to clear Your issues feel too big You just feel like you would like some support in your self-work Working with an experienced practitioner is good practice for anyone doing selfwork. They might be able to point out something that you are doing wrong or could be doing better. They help to see things objectively and provide new perspectives. The idea here is that you don t want to try and take on too much yourself when you should actually be working with a practitioner. It really depends how heavy or intense your issue is (or if you have so many that you don t know where to begin). If you are dealing with severe trauma, you will need to see a practitioner. If you know there are old emotions that are going to be really ugly, you might want to deal with a practitioner. If you know that this is just too big of an issue or that there is a sense that there is something in there, go see a practitioner. If you have been tapping on yourself and it has not been budging at all, try seeing a practitioner! You get the gist. There are different places to find a qualified practitioner. Please visit the resource page for locating practitioners at The Tapping Resource Plus website. There you will find links to directories of practitioners who may be local to you. Many EFT Tapping Practitioners work by Skype or by phone, so it s fine if you see someone who does not live near you.

23 9. Using positive words too soon There are two issues to address with this common mistake. The first is a question we often get as practitioners - Why do we use negative wording when we do tapping? The other is the issue of jumping into positive wording too soon. WHY WE USE NEGATIVE WORDING The focus on using negative words in EFT Tapping really bothers some people. If you have delved into the world of affirmations, positive thinking, you create your reality, and the law of attraction, then you might even have a fear of saying the negative wording because you are afraid that somehow it will make it happen. We as EFT Practitioners understand your concern. It s a very common question that we all get as practitioners. Here s why we do this. The wording doesn t necessarily stay negative. If you ve ever witnessed an entire session, you ll notice that we do switch to positive wording as fast as we can. The challenge is that if you do it too soon it will not help you at all. The idea behind it is that you need to meet what s really there, the truth of what you are actually feeling. Sugar-coating it with positive words will not clear it. It s not about the logical truth; rather, it s that feeling, that kid anger or kid emotion or kid belief. You may feel like you shouldn t feel a certain way but inside you might still be raging or having a tantrum or taking things on. You know these aren t logical sometimes, so you try to think your way out of it. But the emotions are still there and need to be addressed and resolved. You really need to acknowledge that,

24 and you need to be present with it. By using the negative wording, you are addressing where you are right now with it. It s not that it s going to stay there forever, but it addresses the true feeling of what s happening inside. It s honest. Often we are avoiding that, and you may find it is uncomfortable saying the negative words. Because you ve been trying to tell yourself over and over and over that it s not true. But now that you start to tap on it, you are safe because you have a tool that will help you address it. If you deny that, it is not going to solve your issue. Doing tapping is the perfect time to face it. Not in the way that you have to white-knuckle it or prepare yourself to face the pain, rather, it s simply addressing the emotion and the energy exactly where it is at the moment. It doesn t mean it s going to stay there! But it will not magically disappear if you keep trying to deny it and trying to affirm your way right out of it. When you ve actually cleared out the negative, the positive words naturally bubble up and feel true. That is the most effective time to use positive words in tapping. Then it reflects how you actually feel and can be a more powerful positive tool. USING POSITIVE WORDS TOO SOON Depending on where and how you learned how to tap, you may have been exposed to positive wording in your tapping practice. It does certainly have its place, but timing is everything with this. Tappers often rush into using positive words too quickly. It s common to see this in tapping videos. What happens when you leap into using positive wording too soon is that if it is not congruent with the actual feeling inside, the bottom line is that you will not get the results you want. You can sweet-talk yourself until you are blue in the face, but you will not clear that issue you so desperately want to be rid of.

25 Congruence is the key. As we just noted, you need to meet yourself where you are in that moment. If you have a bunch of negative feelings or beliefs inside about an issue, you need to first address those feelings and beliefs. Skipping over them and jumping into nice words will just waste your time. That being said, there is a time when more positive wording can be introduced. There is a place for it! For example, you might have a belief that you can t do something and so you use phrasing like, even though I just can t do it, I love and accept myself anyway. I can t do it, I can t do it, I can t do it. It sounds terrible when you re saying that. But, when you are focused on the negative words, the idea is not to focus on the words themselves. What you are trying to do with this is use language that meets you where you are at that moment. Alternately, if you were to start out by using wording like I think I can do it, if I just give it a try I ll do it, I can do it, the problem is that you are not there. In essence you are lying to yourself. If you begin by tapping using the negative words, once you get your intensity rating down or your truth rating (how true does this feel) to a low enough number that it feels natural to introduce something positive, then you can try it. You might start by using some transitional possibility or maybe statements like maybe I can be open to this being different or I m open to the possibility that (state more positive reality). Once you get your rating down to a 3 or less, then it s safer to start to introduce some positive wording if you d like. You can continue tapping on the negative

26 until he goes all the way down. But here is where you could potentially offer in some more positive phrasing. Sometimes this happens naturally. You may be tapping with the negative wording and then all of a sudden it kind of pops. You may notice yourself saying, well of course I really can do it! When this happens, there s a full belief happening. It lines up and you feel it to really be true for you. If and when you do start using positive wording, check in with yourself and make sure that you are actually feeling that and it s not just in your head. Make sure it feels true to you. If it still feels like a lie, go back to the negative wording until you can go return to positive wording and say it with the actual truth behind it rather than a feeling like you re forcing it. 11. Forgetting to tap (on everything and anything) This mistake is the obvious one about simply forgetting to tap! We hear it from clients all the time, and we forget to do it as practitioners! This is normal. If you forget to tap, it may be that your body needs a break, especially if you ve been doing a lot of tapping. Or perhaps your system forgets because you need something other than tapping in that moment. In any case, you can always come back to it. If you get into a regular practice of tapping and clearing any emotional and physical problems, issues, obstructions, you ll be doing yourself a huge favor by

27 giving your body a chance to rebalance and do some deeper healing. The more opportunities you give your system to completely rebalance and relax, the more optimal your state of health will become. That can mean more positive emotional states, good physical health, and better performance in every area of your life. So do yourself a favour and remember to tap! Thank you! We hope you have enjoyed this free report on the 10 Common Tapping Mistakes. We hope it helps you in your tapping practice. If you have any questions or would like to keep up with anything new in the tapping world, be sure to visit The Tapping Resource Plus website. Here you will find articles, you can shop for EFT and wellness-related books, products and programs, and you can listen to book and app reviews and find directories to all things tapping-related!