OH MY. IT S THE VERY LAST UNSTOPPABLE WORKBOOK! WELL DONE TO YOU.

WEEK 6 Setting yourself up for success MONDAY WORKBOOK OH MY. IT S THE VERY LAST UNSTOPPABLE WORKBOOK! WELL DONE TO YOU. Week 6 is all about setting you up for success by making sure you don t sabotage yourself, by helping you recognise that others may unconsciously sabotage you as you change, and by giving you the skills to a) say no to what you don t want and b) create a fabulous and inspiring vision board. SHALL WE GET INTO IT? LET S GO! PAGE 1

1 Cast your mind back over the last year or two. Can you remember times where you ve unconsciously sabotaged yourself because you felt uncomfortable with how well things were going for you? Remember that this upperlimiting behaviour tends to involve worry, criticism, blame, getting sick, getting into trouble and/or indulging in comfort behaviours. Use the following guide to jot down what you remember: WHAT WAS GOING REALLY WELL AT THE TIME? WHAT SCARED YOU ABOUT THIS? WHAT BEHAVIOURS DID YOU ENGAGE IN TO KEEP YOURSELF WITHIN YOUR UPPER LIMITS? 2 Looking at this list above, what do you think might be the behaviours you engage in most to upper limit yourself? A super important note from us here. Please don t put yourself under pressure to fix your self-sabotage immediately. We can tell you it ain t gonna happen! These are habits that you ve had for many years. They ll take a long time to dissolve, and that s OK. All you need to do is be aware of it sadly, there is no silver bullet to make upper-limiting go away except via observation. More on this in Homeplay. PAGE 2

3 Are there others in your life that are unconsciously sabotaging you as you grow and change? Who are they? What sabotage behaviours do you see them using to keep you in a place that makes THEM feel comfortable? 4 How are you going to give yourself permission to shine in spite of and amidst their discomfort? As an example (Gem here), I have people in my life who seemed uncomfortable with my high levels of affection and warmth and exuberance (disapproving stares are pretty easy to read). I noticed that whenever I was in their company, I toned myself down. I even stopped giving big hugs when they arrived. And I felt less joyful when I was around them as a result. So what do I do now? I just say to hell with it and give them huge hugs and behave as exuberantly as I want. To hell with what they think of me! It s my party and I ll hug if I want to. So, what are your strategies for dealing with any upper-limiting people in your life? PAGE 3

5 Don t think about this next question too much. Write down the things that you d really rather not have in your life anymore. In other words, what do you need to start saying NO to? Brainstorm a list below. Don t think too hard, just go! 6 Now pick the thing you ve listed above that you most want to say no to. Making sure you are honest and succinct, without unnecessary explanation or justification, write down your draft no script below (for example, Jill, thank you for asking me to darn your socks. I won t be able to on this occasion. Many thanks for thinking of me ). PAGE 4

7 What s your deadline for saying no? What mechanism will you use to say no? (email, phone, owl post ). How do you want to feel as you say no? Jot down your commitment to saying no below (example: I will say no to darning Jill s socks via owl post by the end of next week and I will feel empowered and free, with no guilt whatsoever ). 8 It s time for a big brainstorm. Get quiet and still. Tune into your body. Ask yourself: what am I drawn to at the moment? What feels like it s calling me? What ideas or pictures or places or goals keep popping up in my head, or in my life, or on the pages of my journal? Jot them down here. These answers to question 8 will be used in your homeplay. Speaking of PAGE 5

HOMEPLAY 1 When things start going well in any area of your life, just watch yourself kindly and with no judgement. See if you have an urge to start sabotaging yourself Watch as it happens. Don t get cross at yourself just make a mental note of a) what triggered the behaviour and b) what the behaviour is. If you can, try to gently stop yourself engaging in upper limit behaviours. If you can t, that s fine try again next time. 2 Say no! Use your answers to questions 6 and 7 as inspiration. Then tell us how you went on Facebook. 3 Make your vision board! And make sure it s pleasurable! Play awesome music. Sip a cup of whatever floats your boat. Carve time out for yourself to do this. Enjoy! 4 If you feel like it, we d love to see your vision board on Facebook! CONGRATULATIONS ON FINISHING YOUR LAST WORKBOOK! WE LL SEE YOU FOR OUR LAST COACHING SESSION ON WEDNESDAY TIL THEN! PAGE 6