Level 4 exemplars and comments Paper 1 Section A, Question 1 1
Section A, Question 1 2
Section A, Question 1 3
Section A, Question 1 4
Section A, Question 1 5
Section A, Question 1 6
Section A, Question 1 7
Section A, Question 1 8
Section A, Question 1 Comments (i) Although expression is not as good as it might have been, the answer covers several relevant points. However, does not attempt to note any aspect of comparison or contrast. (ii) Answers question well by explaining actions of all those present. Relies too heavily on quotations, though, without fully explaining their relevance. (iii) Accurately describes tone and refers to choppy lines and exclamations. Frequent problems with spelling and fluency affect meaning in parts. 9
Sample 2: Section C, Question 5 10
Sample 2: Section C, Question 5 11
Sample 2: Section C, Question 5 Comments (i) Identifies the intimate relationship. Mentions interesting symbolism of crossed forks. (ii) Offers a fairly straightforward explanation as to the use of different tenses in relation to content. (iii) Makes an attempt to explain symbolism, though the response is not entirely plausible. 12
Paper 2 Part I Section B, Question 3 13
Part I Section B, Question 3 14
Part I Section B, Question 3 15
Part I Section B, Question 3 16
Part I Section B, Question 3 17
Part I Section B, Question 3 18
Part I Section B, Question 3 Comments The candidate shows a good grasp of Othello as a play and is able to manipulate details to bear argumentatively on the question. For the most part, relevant examples are cited in the response to shed light on the role magic and the supernatural play in developing character, advancing plot and reinforcing theme. Some points, however, remain unclear, notably whether Desdemona is truly fascinated by Othello s story about the handkerchief s magic and how this episode contributes to the audience s empathy. 19
Sample 2: Part I Section D, Question 8 20
Sample 2: Part I Section D, Question 8 21
Sample 2: Part I Section D, Question 8 22
Sample 2: Part I Section D, Question 8 23
Sample 2: Part I Section D, Question 8 24
Sample 2: Part I Section D, Question 8 25
Sample 2: Part I Section D, Question 8 Comments This response demonstrates understanding of how writers make use of literary techniques to present characters changes and development in short stories. In general, the discussion of the ways in which symbols, vivid descriptions and succinct language are used to achieve this effect in The Yellow Wallpaper and Cathedral is clear and sound. The analysis of The Chrysanthemums, however, is less satisfactory. Elaboration or further evidence is needed to show how Eliza s sense of coldness and failure at the end is conveyed through the story-teller s deliberate incomplete description or lack of explanation. 26
Paper 3 Extended Essay: A Comparative Study on Political Corruption in Margaret Atwood s The Handmaid s Tale and George Orwell s Animal Farm 27
Extended Essay: A Comparative Study on Political Corruption in Margaret Atwood s The Handmaid s Tale and George Orwell s Animal Farm 28
Extended Essay: A Comparative Study on Political Corruption in Margaret Atwood s The Handmaid s Tale and George Orwell s Animal Farm 29
Extended Essay: A Comparative Study on Political Corruption in Margaret Atwood s The Handmaid s Tale and George Orwell s Animal Farm 30
Extended Essay: A Comparative Study on Political Corruption in Margaret Atwood s The Handmaid s Tale and George Orwell s Animal Farm 31
Extended Essay: A Comparative Study on Political Corruption in Margaret Atwood s The Handmaid s Tale and George Orwell s Animal Farm 32
Extended Essay: A Comparative Study on Political Corruption in Margaret Atwood s The Handmaid s Tale and George Orwell s Animal Farm 33
Extended Essay: A Comparative Study on Political Corruption in Margaret Atwood s The Handmaid s Tale and George Orwell s Animal Farm 34
Extended Essay: A Comparative Study on Political Corruption in Margaret Atwood s The Handmaid s Tale and George Orwell s Animal Farm 35
Extended Essay: A Comparative Study on Political Corruption in Margaret Atwood s The Handmaid s Tale and George Orwell s Animal Farm Comments The stated purpose of the essay is to compare the books in terms of what they have to say about the origins and methods of political corruption, and the candidate does a reasonable job of sticking to this, although the nature of the corruption in each text is rather taken for granted. A sense of structure is present. The headings are particularly helpful as structuring devices, but there should have been an overview at the opening to tell the reader what the overall structure would be. The analysis touches on a number of relevant textual aspects: abuse of power, language, biblical allusions (not particularly convincingly, though), speeches, voice, etc. There are some positive aspects of the organisation e.g. the candidate attempts to compare the two texts consistently, there is a clear line of thought which is maintained throughout, and there is a consistent analytical tone. The candidate has some problems with structuring academic discourse, though, especially when it comes to juxtaposing the two texts. There is an extensive Works Cited page, but no indication of which of the texts was used where in the text. With hindsight, there was probably enough to talk about in just one of these two texts. Mostly fulfills the task requirements. 36
Sample 2: Extended Essay: The Destined Destruction of Macbeth and Tess 37
Sample 2: Extended Essay: The Destined Destruction of Macbeth and Tess 38
Sample 2: Extended Essay: The Destined Destruction of Macbeth and Tess 39
Sample 2: Extended Essay: The Destined Destruction of Macbeth and Tess 40
Sample 2: Extended Essay: The Destined Destruction of Macbeth and Tess Comments The candidate has stated her argument in the introduction and argued whether Macbeth and Tess are playthings of God. She has done a reasonable job in following her argument and has elaborated it in every paragraph. She has a consistent and coherent structure and sticks to her argument throughout. The major area of weaknesses is that she has over-simplified the topic and has a rather superficial understanding of the theme, fate. The character of Macbeth and what has driven him to kill has not been dealt with. The understanding and analysis of fate is over-simplistic. There is no discussion of other supernatural elements in the play apart from the prophecies of the three witches. It is a bit ambitious for the candidate to discuss such a broad topic with reference to these two texts, and little connection is made between the two protagonists. 41