Welcome back everyone! This lesson is called making changes that last Now that we have learned what works, we are going to learn how to make all of these changes s;ck 1
Specifically in this lesson we will go over. The difficulty of maintaining goals - Why even the most disciplined people struggle - How to overcome this A strategy called self- monitoring - Which includes the scien;fic benefits of tracking your progress - Simple ways to monitor yourself And then of course some prac;cal strategies for maintaining your goals And then some final takeaways I have for you on the science of willpower 2
So let s start by talking about why it is so hard to maintain your goals 3
And the best case to look at to see just how hard it can be to maintain your goals is the one and only Oprah Winfrey Oprah is one of the hardest working, most successful people of all ;me, yet despite her extraordinary level of willpower, even she has had problems achieving her weight loss 4
How can someone with so much discipline and enough money to pay for all of the personal trainers and nutri;onists she wants have so many problems? 5
To put it in plain terms, the part of the brain used to maintain your goals is different than the one used to reach them and that is found by the Zeignarik effect 6
The Zeignarik effect was discovered by a psychologist who was amazed by the memory of a waiter in a restaurant He could remember a seemingly infinite number of orders without wri;ng anything down. And when he served, he remembered exactly who ordered which dish. 7
But, azer the psychologist had lez the restaurant he realized that he had forgo[en something. So he returned to the waiter to see if he had seen it. The waiter acted like he had never seen the man before in his life. Just 30 minutes ago, he not only knew the man, but he also knew exactly where he sat at the table and exactly what he ordered. But now he was clueless! Why did this happen? 8
The answer lies in what is known as the Zeignarik effect The waiter could remember every order perfectly un;l it was delivered. Once the order was complete, his mind crossed that order off his internal checklist, so he was free to forget about it and move on to the next thing. This phenomenon plays an important role in helping us achieving our goals. Because if our goal is to lose 10 lbs, and we re only at 5lbs, our mind will know that we have not completed the goal so it will s;ll be on our internal checklist. So with every decision we make about food or exercise, we will get this internal nag reminding us that we haven t reached out goal yet. Even though this may not always lead to making the right decision, it at least reminds us of our higher aspira;ons. However, once we lose the 10lbs, that internal reminder system is gone! So when we re thinking about whether or not to exercise, or taking a look at the dessert cart, we don t have that reminder to eat healthy helping us anymore. So we slowly start slipping back to our pre- goal selves. 9
This is why you should never set a results oriented goal. Because once you reach the result, your mind checks it off your list and it s on to the next thing. Meanwhile the thing you just completed starts to slip just like it did with Oprah. Instead you should set a process oriented goal Now the end goal isn t losing a certain amount of weight, it s crea;ng a healthy lifestyle. It s not finishing a marathon, it s becoming a runner So now your internal reminder system is always working for you. Your goal is never complete because you can always always improve your process 10
But some;mes the internal reminder system is not enough you need to use something called Self- Monitoring 11
And to explain the value of self monitoring, let s look at what happens in the brain when see ourselves in the mirror. When scien;sts look at the brains of people who see themselves in the mirror, something odd occurs. The part of the brain that would say hey, that s me in the mirror! doesn t light up. Instead, it s the part that says I wish I was taller, more muscular, etc. 12
In other words, we don t see who we are. We see who we want to be 13
So the ques;on researchers sought to answer is would we let ourselves down less if we saw ourselves in the mirror? 14
To answer the ques;on, they invited 2 groups of dieters into a room to rate different candy bars. They were each allowed to eat as much of the candy as they d like in order to secure a definite ra;ng The difference was that one group sat at a table that was directly in front of a mirror. So they could not help but watch themselves eat the candy. While the other group didn t have to face their own reflec;on. 15
The group that saw themselves in the mirror not only ate less candy But they also reported that it wasn t as difficult for them to eventually stop ea;ng than the other group! Despite the fact that the other group had eaten more candy, it was s;ll harder for them to eventually say enough 16
Now, before you go filling your house with mirrors, let s look at the reason why this was successful By looking in the mirror, these par;cipants were given a constant reminder of the person that they really want to be They were able to remember their higher aspira;ons and desire to be the best versions of themselves. And that was more important to them than the short- term indulgence of the candy So they were able to switch from their I Won t power to their I Want power This switch doesn t just happen from looking at yourself in the mirror, it happens every ;me you track your progress in something. Keeping a food journal Tracking your exercise progress Monitoring your spending 17
Alright and for the last ;me, let s talk about some prac;cal strategies that you can implement to make your goals last 18
First, make sure that your ONE Goal is process oriented If your goal is to lose weight, change it to ea;ng healthy for 2 meals out of the day or crea;ng a habit of exercise. If it is to get a degree Change it to devo;ng 2 hours to studying every night. Otherwise once you achieve your goal, you will begin to let all of the great habits that you built up to achieve it start to slip. 19
Next, start monitoring yourself Track your progress and hold yourself accountable to the standards that you know you re capable of living up to You don t even need to be very hard on yourself to do this! It has been shown that a food diary is the number one way dieters lose weight even if they don t cut out a thing! The simple act of wri;ng everything down is enough. If your goal is diet based, you can keep a food journal If your goal is exercise based, you can track your workouts If your goal is to s;ck to a budget, you can monitor your transac;ons You will find a list of free tools for these and other goals in the further study sec;on 20
Okay and as we come to the end, I will give you some final takeaways on the science of willpower When it comes to the science of willpower, these are what I have come to learn are the most important principles in achieving anything great. These are what separates those who make it from those who don t. 21
The first of which is that no ma[er what your goal is focus on simply winning the day. We put ourselves through an extraordinary amount of pain when we focus on how far we are away from reaching our goals. When really the only important thing is doing today what needs to be done. When we win today, we grow confidence in ourselves. We believe that we can win tomorrow. And the next day. And eventually all of these days add up and we find ourselves much further than we thought we could make it. 22
The second is to use ;me as an ally, not an enemy. In our world of instant gra;fica;on, we have begun to expect big results, fast! So we crash diet, we go on 8- week workout programs and we set mul;ple goals at once. Then of course we crash when we don t have the willpower to live up to all of these unsustainable goals. We get into a self- destruc;ve loop of overextending ourselves, failing, bea;ng ourselves up for not having the willpower, giving up on our goals, then sejng huge goals again but this ;me promising ourselves that we ll summon the willpower that we didn t have last ;me. This is using ;me as an enemy. It con;nues to go by and all we have to show for it is failure azer failure. Instead, you have the remarkable ability to use ;me to your advantage if you have the pa;ence. What would have happened if last year you simply devoted 20 minutes/ day working toward your ONE goal? Would you have achieved it? You will likely live many more years. There is no rush to achieve your goals. Simply make the right choices every day and let ;me takes its course un;l you reach your des;na;on. 23
The third is to focus on your effort. Effort is ul;mately the only thing that you can control. You cannot control how your body will react to diet and exercise. You cannot control whether your boss gives you a promo;on or what ques;ons the professor puts on your exam. The only thing you can control is your effort. So do yourself a favor and forget about the end results. With enough focused effort in the right direc;on they will come. Un;l they do, simply focus your a[en;on on giving your best effort toward gejng there. 24
And finally, greatness is a journey without a des;na;on. Whatever your goal, whatever your dream, whatever you want to be great at, remember that it is about the journey. Do not become obsessed with finally making it because even when you make it where you think you want to go, you will not be sa;sfied. You will want to con;nue the journey! Because the journey is what life is all about. So whether your journey is one in which you are crea;ng a healthy lifestyle, ending a lifelong struggle with procras;na;on or star;ng a company of your own. I wish you the best of luck and I hope that your knowledge of willpower will make it a li[le bit more successful! 25
And that s all guys, I want to thank you from the bo[om of my heart for being a part of my first online class on the science of willpower. If you ever have any ques;ons, never hesitate to reach out to me! 26