Transforming - Making a Difference - Creating a Life Worth Living Handouts

Transcription

1 NLP Mini Course Week Two Transforming - Making a Difference - Creating a Life Worth Living Handouts

2 Prime Directives Of Your Unconsciouses Mind Does not process negatives Takes everything personally Works on the principle of least effort Responds with instinct and habit Follow directions

3 Don t Think of a Blue Elephant Whenever we are communicating we are placing images in our minds and in other people's minds. Let's do a quick thought experiment. Don't think of a blue elephant up a pink tree, that's a blue elephant up a pink tree. Don't think about it. What are you doing? You are thinking about it. Even if you think you didn t, you did, you just replaced that image really fast. How can I say that with such congidence? Because words are secondary to how we think, we think using our imagination. I'm using the word imagination, precisely. Imagination means all of the senses and not just visualisation.

4 Don t Think of a Blue Elephant Your brain does not know what it does not need to think about, and creates an image of a blue elephant up a pink tree. This is why when you're on a diet and you say to yourself "I will not eat chocolate cake I will not eat chocolate cake" You create an image of you eating chocolate cake, and eventually you say "I can do that". Once you understand this you understand all the underpinning ingluence techniques.

5 Takes Everything Personally Warning, stop reading now if you like to gossip. I'm about to ruin gossiping, sorry. Whatever you say about anyone out loud, your unconscious mind takes personally. It makes no distinction that you are talking about someone else, it thinks you are talking about yourself. And if you've ever worked in a large organisation, you have seen this happen time and time again. You get somebody who starts the team, they re enthusiastic and they re bubbly. Then, within 3 to 4 weeks of joining the team, they start sounding like other people on the team. Then they start acting like other people on the team.

6 Takes Everything Personally And if there is somebody who is consistently late, and they say "how come they get to be late on a regular basis, Give minutes the day before, 10 minutes yesterday?" It's okay to say it once or twice about someone else. But say the same thing about other people for 30 to 40 days, and your unconscious mind starts to go "oh, you would like us to be late. I can arrange that." And it shows up in your behaviour. So whatever you say about anyone else your unconscious mind is taking it personally. I think you are fascinating, interesting and humorous.

7 Principle of Least Effort This can work for you, or it can work against you. For example, it works for you if you ve been exercising and are you going to the gym or out running in the fresh air for at least three months and been training at least three times a week. It can work against you, if you think you want to exercise but you've been putting it off. When you think about exercising you think that you ve got to get the bag out of the cupboard, you ve got to open the bag, you ve got to Gind your trainers your top, your jogging shorts, and you haven't got a sports water bottle - you can't use a normal water bottle, you have to use a sports water bottle - and you're not going into town until next week. And again the gym has been put off for another week. And if you've ever done an Open University course, and in that Girst year they said you had to study for up to 20 hours a week. And you say "but I'm working full-time, how am I going to manage 20 hours a week?" There is a big drop out in that Girst year for those attending an Open University course. But if you stick with it something happens just under half way into the second year.

8 Principle of Least Effort Things click, and you study more than 20 hours a week. And if at the end of three years you stick with it, you re a little bit smug, because you re allowed to be a bit smug if you been working full-time and you ve been studying. And you say something along the lines of "I can't understand how people waste their lives, watching TV during the evenings." "I'm gonna carry on studying". But your big mistake is you take a month off and the principle of least effort starts to work against you where it was working for you. So what changes do you want to make in your life? Would you like to get up at 5 AM every morning and exercise. Then go ahead and do it for 30 to 40 days. Keep to it no matter what and the principle of least effort will work for you in the end.

9 Responds With Instinct & Habit This is all related to the principle of least effort. Your unconscious mind is attempting to make your life easy for you. No, it is not working against you. It is working for you. What it does is it tracks your behaviour, and looks for ways to automate your life so that it's easier for you. For example, Friday night you're driving home from work and your feeling tired - it's been a busy week at work. So you think to yourself I'm gonna grab a takeaway. No big deal, it s a nice treat, you have some fats and sugars and some salts and you're feeling good about yourself. And then the next week you do the same: you're driving home on Friday and think ooh, that was nice last week, I grabbed myself a takeaway. No big deal, but your unconscious mind has just Glagged it because it's seen you do this behaviour before. You might even then leave it a week. Then on the fourth week you do the same, you grab a takeaway on the way home.

10 Responds With Instinct & Habit Before you know it Friday night is takeaway night. Friday night is takeaway night and it's a nice treat. Then it becomes Friday night is takeaway night is just what you now do. And you might be driving home on Wednesday night thinking to yourself I don't want to cook tonight, so I m going to get myself a pizza on the way home. Now, this doesn't change your behaviour but your unconscious mind says "I seen this behaviour before, let me Glag this a little bit sooner." And before you know it, Wednesday night is pizza night, and Friday night is takeaway night. Now this leaves Thursday night free for So yes it makes sense to design the life that you want, design the habits that you want and the question then becomes how do you do that?

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