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2 2 AEE Episode 614: How to Talk About Crime in The U.S. Announcer: This is an All Ears English Podcast Episode 614: How to Talk about Crime in the U.S. [Instrumental] Announcer: Welcome to the All Ears English Podcast, downloaded more than 16 million times. We believe in Connection NOT Perfection, with your American hosts Lindsay McMahon, the English Adventurer, and Michelle Kaplan, the New York Radio Girl, coming to you from Boston and New York City, U.S.A. [Instrumental] Announcer: And to instantly download your transcript from today s episode, go to AllEarsEnglish.com/transcripts, AllEarsEnglish.com/transcripts. [Instrumental] Announcer: Today we answer a listener question about how to talk about crime in the U.S. Find out what the words are, how to use them, and hear about Lindsay's and Michelle's favorite crime show today. [Instrumental] What's up, Michelle? How are you doing today? Not too much. I'm pretty good, I'm pretty good. It's, you know, getting cold and...

3 3 Mm. It's kind of a little sad, but that's all right. How about you? Yeah (yes), I know. I woke up this morning thinking I have the beginning of a sore throat. Ohh. The first cold of the winter. Ohh. And it's just... It's cold, it's cloudy out. But, ohh gosh, what's the good news? Well, it's almost the weekend. So that's good. Even though today's Monday. Okay. We're... Okay. We're recording this on a Friday. So it is actually almost the weekend for us. You caught us. You caught us. That's so funny. Happy Monday, Lindsay! Ohh, I know, I know, I know. So Michelle, what are we talking about today? Well, actually, first Michelle, before we start, let's go ahead and say thank you to our reviewers. Yes. Who reviewed us this week in the itunes store, Michelle? Yes. Thank you to, I do enjoy, Yes, thank you to J-P. Is that a J-I- P? I don't know. From Brazil. Thank you.

4 4 Okay. And thank you... That was a great review that that person left. Very profound and long comment. Yes. So thank you for that. Yeah (yes), thank you so much. And thank you to daniel from Mexico. And... Yes. To 5anti15 from Columbia. Awesome. So we got three reviews this week. Guys, if you haven't left your review in the itunes store, it really makes a difference with our success in the itunes store. So go on over there and review All Ears English. Tell us what you like about the show. Yes, please. We really like to hear it. Okay Michelle, today we're talking about crime. Ohh. Ohh, big topic. Huge topic. And it's a topic that people love in this country, like, when it comes to crime and crime shows. I was talking about this last night with someone. We were saying that the most popular shows in the U.S. right now are either crime-oriented or they're hospital-oriented. Like...

5 5 You know, those shows like Grey's Anatomy, and those kinds of shows, are always popular because people love... I think people are fascinated with death. I think that's why, you know? And also, just suspense. Suspense. I think that, I mean, maybe if it's not crime and it's not hospital, like there... I feel like there's no element of suspense, right? So it's the idea of the cliffhanger. Mm. Right? Like the cliffhanger. What's a cliffhanger, Lindsay? It's where we're stuck and we're not quite given... We're given, like, pieces of what might happen or hints and we're left guessing. We're left... Or something happens, like, towards the end and it's, like, "Ohh, my gosh! I can't believe it!" And then the episode's over. We're like, "No." Okay. That's a better explanation. Yeah (yes), yeah (yes). I like that. So yeah (yes). So I think the quality of TV shows are just getting better and better. But let's go back to the question. So, a listener asked as a question and we're going to kind of talk a little bit about different TV shows to kind

6 6 of relate to them because, I mean, I don't experience a lot of crime in my daily life, luckily. Bah! Humbah! So we ve got to go to TV for it. But what's the question from Okay. The question. It says, "Hi Lindsay and Michelle. I hope you are very well. I like you and your precious podcast a lot." Aww. We like you. Thank you. I have learned so much and I am thirsty for more. Woo! Good expression. I know, that is really good. "I am really grateful. Anyway, here's one of my questions. I'm usually confused about these "convicted", "accused", "charged" and etc. Actually, I know the meaning but I want to know the difference of the"... "Of their consequences, especially in the U.S. I really appreciate your answer in advance. Have a good one. " Ohh, good question. That is a good question. That's a toughie. I know, because we haven't talked much about crime and punishment on the show. And as soon as I read this question my mind went to a series that... That both, the two of us Michelle, we are both watching or have watched. I finished the series. It was a mini-series on HBO called The Night Of.

7 7 Okay. And Michelle, you watched episode one, but you're waiting for your husband... To continue this series together. Is that right? That's right. Okay. But I really, really, really want to watch it. I was just talking about this last night. So what's the gist of the show, Michelle? Okay. So basically it's about a guy who is born in the U.S. He's... I don't know how old he is. Like a teen or... I think... Or was it early twenties? No, I think... Yeah (yes), like, early twenties. Like 22. And his family is from Pakistan. And he's a really, really good kid, and he basically blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. He wants to go to this party and he can't... He can't get to the party because his friend backs out on him, so he takes his dad's cab and... Taxi cab. Any he... And he meets... He meets this woman and, what happens next, Lindsay? Well, she jumps in the cab, even though he says that he's not working, he's off-duty.

8 8 Uhh huh. This is in a downtown area of New York City, I think. West Village or something. She jumps in and she says, "Ohh, take me uptown." or "Take me to the beach." So they go to the beach and they take drugs and they start kissing and then they go back to her house and they make out and they end up having sex there. And then he passes out, right? And he wakes up a few... But actually, we forgot to say the part about the knife. There is a knife involved. But she's just kind of playing around with it. She's a little bit weird. She is... She is a lot bit weird. And he... And he is kind of... Well, they weren't even really doing anything at the beach. It was more when they got back to the house, right? That's right. And then they were like... And then things got a little bit... I don't even know how to describe it. A little crazy. A little crazy. Well, let's just say they were taking a lot of drugs. Yeah (yes), okay. A lot of drugs, different drugs. I think they were taking molly. Which is... What is that? Ecstasy? I think is what it is. I don't know.

9 9 And they're also taking a bunch of... Mixing weird drugs. So they were definitely in weird places in their heads. But they had like... And this is not that, like, normal night for this guy. He was more, I think... No. Just like taking her lead. Ohh, totally. He was, like, a good kid. Like, he didn't really do much, in terms of drugs. He was a good student. He was a tutor. That sort of thing. So she was playing, like, weird games with this knife when she was on drugs. Like, they were... So there was a knife already in the house and they're playing around with it, but basically they got to the point where, after they were in bed together, then I guess they just passed out, and then, you know, a few hours later he wakes up and he's in the kitchen. You saw this part, right Michelle? Okay. He's in the kitchen. He wakes up and then he goes back to say goodbye to her because he's going to go back home. He turns on the light and she's been stabbed, like, 22 times in her back. Yeah (yes), yeah (yes). And he's like, "Ohh, my God." He freaks out. Because he thinks, "Did I do this?" Right. Right. "Did I do this?" And he... He didn't know because, I mean...

10 10 He feels like he could never do it, right? Because he's a good kid. He couldn't imagine that he could do it, but then there was always that element of doubt in his head, right? Moving forward. Like, "Whoa." He was on so many drugs he doesn't even know what happened. Right. So he grabs the knife and he runs out because he panics, right? Grabs the knife, runs out of the house, then gets caught by the cops. And, of course, he's the prime suspect moving forward because the bloody knife is there... Did you see this part, Michelle? Yeah (yes), yeah (yes), yeah (yes). That... Yeah (yes), the bloody knife was there, it's all. I'm, like, when the police got to the house and... Yeah (yes), I saw that when he goes to jail. Exactly, so... So we would just recommend that you guys check out the show. It's a really good show, and a lot of issues come up later on, important issues in our society that you want to take a look at. And so I won't tell anymore because, Michelle, I know you don't want to know the ending. I know, I know. Yeah (yes), don't spoil it. Have you guys... Spoiler alert! No spoilers in this. Exactly. So, really, our listener here asked us about some vocabulary words. So, we're going to try to pull in this story as much as possible, but actually try not to give away the ending there. Or, or even close to the end.

11 11 And let's talk about... Yeah (yes), yeah (yes). Let's talk about what these words mean, though, Michelle. "Convicted". Okay. What does that mean? Okay. So "law: to find or prove someone guilty of an offense or crime, especially by the verdict of a court". So, "The jury convicted..." "...the defendant of manslaughter." Right. That's not necessarily what happened in the show, don't worry, Michelle. I'm not giving you the... I'm not giving you the answer... About what happened at the end of the show. This is just, just an example. Yes. Okay. So, to be convicted is to be... To be... When the jury decides that you are guilty of an offense. Okay? So, for our listener that asked the question, umm... Uhh, d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d. So, I'm afraid that I'm giving it away. Yeah (yes), I know. And did you read this role play? This time, well... No, I won't tell you. Okay. Well, no. You're not giving it away. But... No, I'm not giving it away. Okay. No, you're not.

12 12 Let's go ahead... Let's do a little role play, Michelle, to show the meaning of "convicted". But only the one part I didn't know, but that's okay. Okay. Okay. "So, Lindsay, in this show Naz is convicted of murder?" "Well, Michelle, the public was convinced that he did it. There was so much evidence when he ran out of the girl's house that night, after finding her stabbed. He also took the knife with him. But I won't tell you if he was convicted. You have to watch it." See, I knew that second part. But I didn't know the public was convinced, not like I could guess. Okay. So... So, yeah (yes), that's... So, that's an example of how to use the word "convicted". Okay? And what was the second word, Michelle, that our listener asked about? The second word is "accused". Mm. Okay. So when you're accused you are, like, the defendant in a criminal case. Right. Okay. And you're accused of doing something. In this case, you know, he was, hopefully you know this, Michelle... He was accused of murder... Yes. By the district attorney, right? The DA...

13 13 Uhh huh. Is the person who represents the state and brings a case against an accused criminal. That's what a DA does. Right. Many states have a DA, and then other states might call it something different. Okay. So that's... That's "accused". I mean, it's pretty straightforward, I think, for the most part. What do you think, Michelle? Uhh, yeah (yes). I think so. Okay. And then the next one... And a couple of other vocabulary words that we can throw in here are "charged"... Uhh huh. What does that mean, Michelle? To be convicted of, right? An indictment charging someone with murder, which leads us to the next word. Right. So, "indictment" is a formal document. So, I didn't know this until I looked this up. So, this is a good, more advanced, vocabulary word, guys, that you might want to add to your repertoire here. It's a formal document that it's written for a prosecuting attorney that's charging a person with some kind of offense. Okay? Right, right. And don't people say, like, "to be indicted"? To be indicted. Right. Right, right, right.

14 14 So, I think that means that you... That the document has been written up about you, and it's saying that you are being charged with this offense. It's done after... I believe it's done after the whole trial. But, I'm not a lawyer, but it's... I don't know too much about it. But I think that you guys would, you know, you would learn a lot about these words if you did go ahead and watch these shows. There's so many crime shows on right now, and they're a little bit disturbing, to be honest, like, some of them. I mean, they can keep you up at night. Ohh, yeah (yes). They're really all... The cliffhangers and the twists and sometimes they're very gory. This one for sure was. This one's a little gory. And this one is just disturbing, you know what I mean? It's just disturbing, and I'm not going to say any more. But as you go through it, it's, like, "Ohh, man. There are these issues in our society that... That really happen and it's sad." Yeah (yes), yeah (yes). You know? I don't know. Alright, well... So, anyways... I'll let you know when I watch it. I'm, like, really excited.

15 15 So we came up with a couple of bonus phrases that are a little bit more conversational, guys, that you can also throw into our conversation when you're talking about crime. Okay? And it's not that you have to be personally involved in a crime to talk about it. You know, there's a lot of... You're talking about these TV shows, for example. Right, right. Right? Right. Like, for our listeners who live in the U.S., probably you want to connect with your colleagues on Monday morning. And one of the big topics that people talk about is TV shows. What TV shows... Right. Because TV shows are so good now. It's so funny because they used... For a long time everybody was, like, "Nobody watches TV anymore." And then like... Everything got so good. I think... Something changed. Yeah (yes), yeah (yes). That's right. And only in the last few years... Is when the things have changed to become really good. It started with Netflix, I think.

16 16 Like, umm, series like Orange is the New Black. But now, it's actually just on regular TV, too, like HBO and things. Right, right, right. [Instrumental] Announcer: Remember, guys, if you didn't catch something from today's episode, or if you want to go deeper with the episode and learn the vocabulary from today, you need the transcripts. Go to AllEarsEnglish.com/transcripts to grab them right now. [Instrumental] So, what's the first bonus phrase, Michelle, that we can use? Okay. "To be behind bars." Ohh, okay. So, yeah (yes), "to be behind bars" is basically... It's pretty selfexplanatory. The bars of the jail. Of the jail cell. It's literally behind bars. You're in jail. Right? And then there's the famous place, Alcatraz. Uhh huh. Which we can refer to as The Rock. Uhh huh. I've been there, actually. Yeah (yes), me too, actually. When I was little. Did you do the tour?

17 17 Yes, and, like, I think I have pictures in, like, a cell and stuff. But this was when I was little. What about you? Same here. We took a family vacation in San Francisco. Yeah (yes), same. And that's... That's one of the big things that you do when you visit San Francisco, as a tourist. You go to Alcatraz. Sounds so funny to do that. But... It's weird, but... So, it used to be a very high security jail because it was right in the middle of San Francisco Bay. And, if people wanted to escape they had to basically swim or find a way through the waters by boat, and the water was very cold in the San Francisco Bay. Okay. So, there's a lot of history, guys. If you're curious about Alcatraz, go to Wikipedia and start doing some research. There's also a movie, I believe, called Escape from Alcatraz about one of the famous escape cases that happened. Very fascinating. Hmm. How did you feel, Michelle, when you heard the voices of the prisoners in that recording, when you took your tour of Alcatraz? Ohh, I don't know. This could have been 20 years ago. Sure.

18 18 I don't remember, but I remember that I was freaked out by the whole thing. I was like, "Why are we doing this? On a vacation? I didn't... I didn't really get it at that age. It's pretty cool. So, check out Alcatraz, guys. Fascinating story, fascinating situation. It's closed now, obviously, but interesting history. So, what else, Michelle? What's another way to say that someone's in jail? You could say they're "in the slammer". Mm. In the slammer. Do you use this one anymore? I feel like I... This is kind of old-fashioned. I used to hear this more. But you might hear it. Like, I don't know. I think that it's a good one to know because... I wouldn't... I wouldn't say it... personally, I don't think that I would hear it around, maybe on TV shows. Yeah (yes), totally. Exactly. It's kind of a more historical phrase, but good to know.

19 19 And then, the next one is a phrasal verb "to bust out". That's like to... To either escape from jail or, I don't know, or even just get out of jail, right? Yeah (yes), and I think it's also interesting how sometimes phrases that are meant for one context can be translated and used in a lighter way in other contexts. Like, I've said before things, like, "Ohh, let's bust out of here." Right. Like, if I'm in a restaurant and it's too busy, and I don't want to sit down because there are too many people. "Ohh, let's bust out." Right, right. Have you ever used that in a normal context, conversational context? I don't know if I say it. But I would. I mean... You would. I can't... Yeah (yes), yeah (yes). So it's, yeah (yes)... But do you think it's more like "escape" or also just, like, ohh, when they're being released? "I go. I'm busting out of here." Like... I would guess that it's "escape". Yeah (yes), I would guess it's probably when you are getting out of jail. No, but I mean, like, escape, like a planned escape, or like... Or even if, like, "Ohh, when are you busting out of here?" You know, like, kind of used in a looser sense? I don't know. What did you find when you looked it up? Well, I mean...

20 20 Did you find... I thought of it. I don't know. Ohh. I don't remember the... Or remember the specifics. I think I saw it somewhere, but I don't remember. I don't remember... Ohh. Like looking up all the difference. I just kind of thought of that now. Okay. Well, that one is on hold. We'll update you, guys. Come back to our blog and we'll clarify the meaning of that. Come back to AllEarsEnglish.com, this is Episode 614. Okay. We'll go back to that. "To bail someone out". We know that one, right? What does that mean? That's... It's... What is bail? Bail is, like, if they can be, like, released from prison if somebody pays. Mm. Yeah (yes), so to bail someone out is when you go in and you pay a certain amount of money and that person's able to get out. Okay. To bail out. And this is also used in a more conversational context. Like, "Ohh, bail me out here. I need some help." Right? Right, right, right. Not even...

21 21 Get me out of this situation. And in that context, if you're in trouble, and it's not about jail, it could... You may not be asking your friend for money, you may be just asking for help. Right? Right, right, right. That's interesting how that happens. I like that. Okay. And if we say someone's "up for parole". What does that mean? I don't actually know. Ohh, that means, like, that they might be released. It's, like, if they're on parole, it's, like, they have a chance to have a reduced sentence or to be released. So they might say, "Ohh, I'm up for parole in so and so months. And then there's a decision made, I'm not sure by whom. But, yeah (yes), up for parole. Okay. Cool, cool. And then "doing time". Right? Is another expression that people use sometimes. A little... I don't know. I don't know if criminals actually use these, because I never talk to criminals. Like, they're not in my world.

22 22 You know, I don't... I don't have any personal connections with anyone who's really been in jail for any length of time. But these are just out in the culture, right? Ohh, yeah (yes). For sure. Yeah (yes), so doing time is just spending time in jail. Okay? And then... Yeah (yes), the next one I have is "jointed", because that's another thing that I saw, that sometimes people used to say for the jail, right? Have you heard that? I have. I have heard that. "The joint". I don't really know the context in which it's used, so I think these... Some of these guys, are more for... Like, this word "joint" is more for you to recognize if you hear other people saying it. And it can mean other things. Like, it could mean, umm... Just like... Smoking marijuana. Right? A joint. To smoke a joint. That can... A totally different meaning. Right? Right. So, we want to be careful. But, sometimes this word joint is used in the context of talking about jail. The physically being in jail. Okay? Yeah (yes), yeah (yes). So, but a lot of these are... You may... I don't know if you'll find the context to say them, except for if you're talking about a TV show. I mean, I hope that's the only time you need to use...

23 23 I hope so, too. Because, I mean, I was watching something last night with a friend, and we were watching TV, we were watching another one of these crime shows, and the situation was that this guy had been proven... He had been accused of raping a woman and he... But he was not... He was... He was not guilty, actually. But he served 16 years in jail, and he was raped and, like, attacked repeatedly during that time. And that actually turned him into a criminal, because as soon as he got out he committed another... He, I mean, he committed his first offense, rather. He raped and killed a woman the night he got out. Wow. A woman that he knew. So I was thinking last night, and we were talking about this, about our prison system in the U.S., and how broken it is. How How... It's incredible that you can put someone into a system and literally turn them into a criminal. Yeah (yes), yeah (yes), yeah (yes), yeah (yes). I mean, that's messed up. I'm sure this happens in other countries, but I'm sure there are also other countries that are experimenting with different ways to deal with criminals. Mm. I know the prison system is very expensive. There's a lot of corruption in there, you know, often with guards kind of ganging up with the prisoners themselves. It's just incredible. It's a huge topic. Yeah (yes), for sure. Yeah (yes), yeah (yes). Well, thank you to our listener for asking this question. Yeah (yes), thank you for asking this question. And I would like to hear from you guys about your prison systems in your countries. And let us know what's going on. I mean, any kind of comments that you want to share would be really interesting. If you come back to

24 24 AllEarsEnglish.com, type in 614 in the search bar and just let us know. Let us know what you thought of today's episode and of what's going on in your country's prison system. I would be really curious to know. Awesome. Yeah (yes), me, too. Well, thank you again. And this has been interesting, Lindsay. Okay. Thanks, Michelle. Take care. Alright, bye. Bye. [Instrumental] Announcer: Thanks so much for listening to All Ears English. And if you need a seven or higher on your IELTS exam to achieve your life vision, then our Insider Method can get you there. Start with our free video series master class. Get video one now at AllEarsEnglish.com/INSIDER, and if you believe in Connection NOT Perfection, then subscribe to our show on your phone or on your computer. See you next time.

25 25 AEE Episode 615: Three Steps to Build Confidence through Grammar with Chris Rush Announcer: This is All Ears English Podcast Episode 615: Three Steps to Build Confidence through Grammar with Chris Rush. [Instrumental] Announcer: Welcome to the All Ears English Podcast, downloaded more than 16 million times. We believe in Connection NOT Perfection, with your American hosts Lindsay McMahon, the English Adventurer, and Michelle Kaplan, the New York Radio Girl, coming to you from Boston and New York City, U.S.A. [Instrumental] Announcer: And to instantly download your transcript from today s episode, go to AllEarsEnglish.com/transcripts, AllEarsEnglish.com/transcripts. Announcer: You want confidence, but what are the specific steps to take to build measurable confidence when it comes to grammar? Today you'll meet our guest who'll show you exactly how to do it. [Instrumental] Announcer: Today we have a guest on All Ears English. Our guest today helps professionals speak better business English. He's been teaching entirely

26 26 [Instrumental] online since 2012 and he's taught more than 1,000 students and has worked with over 100 different companies. He teaches one-on-one lessons on italki and he has spent all of 2016 traveling around the U.S. in an RV. Now let's meet our guest today, Chris Rush. Hey guys, I'm Chris and today I'm going to show you my framework that is guaranteed to bring you confidence when it comes to grammar. If you want to work with me directly, I can walk you step by step through my method. Register at AllEarsEnglish.com/italki, that's I-T-A-L-K-I, for $10 free off your second lesson. Then, find my profile at italki.com/chrisrush. C-H-R-I-S-R-U-S-H. [Instrumental] Hey, Chris. Welcome to All Ears English. Thanks for coming today. How are you doing? I'm doing great, Lindsay. Thank you so much for having me. It's good. So, I hear you are a bit of a traveler, is that true? Yes. So I've been spending the last nine months traveling all across the United States in an RV or a caravan. Wow. And right now I'm taking a little break, yeah (yes), in Pensacola, Florida. Which is kind of my hometown. Ohh, that is excellent. What's one thing that you've learned from your travels, just real quick? I... That people are the same everywhere. That...

27 27 You know, I always had this idea that life would be so different in other places, but it's... It's really not. Scenes are different, people are the same. Love it, love it. Good thing to know, good thing to keep in mind when we're learning a new language and we're crossing cultures. Isn't that right? Absolutely, absolutely. Okay. I've stayed in the United States, just a little bit into... into Canada. So I didn't get so much of that experience, but I, you know, just from that and traveling abroad, I definitely have experienced that to be true. I love that. And so you, you Chris, you focus on business English. And I love the topic that you are bringing to the table today, this idea of how to become confident through grammar. Because a lot of teachers will try to avoid grammar, or they'll kind of make it seem less important than it is, so that we don't get stressed out. And that's one approach, but it sounds like your idea is to work through grammar, work with grammar, to become more confident. Is that kind of what makes you different as a teacher? Exactly. So many of my students, what they need the most -- is they need confidence. That's what I hear over and over. And so, when I ask them why they're not confident, they say so often, "I make mistakes. It's my grammar." Right. So I want to take the focus of grammar and say, "How can we make grammar into something that can help you be more confident instead of less confident?"

28 28 Ohh, I like that. Take the weakness and make it a strength. Absolutely. I love that. So then, this all sounds really, really good, Chris. But how do we do it? I mean, can you give our listeners today three basic actionable tips that they can take away today and get started with right after finishing this episode? Absolutely. Okay. So, I would say the first thing is to say, "Forget about the more advanced tenses." So the way that I kind of think of that is to say, "Go backwards." Okay? Ohh. So, I think one thing that people like to do is we say, "Okay. Well, I'm going to learn all of these tenses." And if you learn too many tenses, the problem is that you can't use any of them well. So, for example, you know, the first tense you learn is the present simple, then you learn the past simple. So, the first thing you need to do is you need to make sure that you are using the present simple and the past simple. And I don't care even if you're an advanced English speaker... And you laugh at the notion of...

29 29 Practicing your past simple. Right. But make sure that you're speaking your past simple with 100 percent accuracy. It doesn't make sense to move to the present perfect, unless you've got your past simple down. Mm. Because the confidence comes from knowing that you're not making mistakes. People are... They lose... We lose our confidence when we're making mistakes and we know it. So if we say, "Okay. Focus on the basic tenses and make sure we're not making mistakes there." Mm. That's how you build confidence. Ohh, I love that, Chris. Because I think that there are a lot of students, even as they move into the intermediate to upper intermediate level who, when they're forming questions in the simple past tense, it gets difficult, and we get confused when we're using "did". That can be... Still be something that, for some reason, many students never quite conquer and there's still a lot of confusion. Things seem kind of gray and hazy to them. So I love this idea of going back and mastering this finally, and then we move forward. Right, Chris? Exactly. It gives this sense of accomplishment to be learning more tenses. So it maybe feels exciting to move on to a new tense before we've mastered an old one, but really, to build confidence, make sure that you're mastering the basic tenses first. Okay. I like that. So, how are we going to actually do this then? I mean, do we need to hire a teacher to do this? Can we isolate the tense on our own and find a language exchange? How do you recommend the practice

30 30 piece. Once we know which tense we need to work on, how do we practice it? So there's two ways. There's... You can do it by yourself and you can do it with a teacher. Obviously, these kinds of things can be much more helpful if you have a teacher that you're working with. Right. But you can do it by yourself, simply by saying, "Okay. I'm not going to worry about the present perfect right now." And I just keep going back to this example. We can use these examples with any grammar tenses. Sure. But just for the sake of the example, I'm going to keep the example to past simple and present perfect. I think those are two tenses that a lot of the listeners here... Will be... Definitely. Familiar with. So we'll... We'll keep it to that. So instead of saying, "Okay. I'm really going to focus. I need to practice the present simple." Well, pause. Don't worry about that so much. Keep your focus on the past simple. And then the place where a teacher can help is to... You really want to make it clear to your teacher that you want to master this past simple or whatever tense that you're working on. And the way that you can do that is by getting lots of corrections. Mm. A lot of times... And I know that I've experienced this also as a teacher, sometimes we don't want to correct 100 percent of the time.

31 31 We don't want to discourage our learners, and we don't want to stop their communication. But for this and this... this to work, for you to really get confidence, to know that you're not making mistakes, you need to make sure that your teacher is on the same page. Has the same understanding with you and will correct you every time. And that's how you'll know you're not making mistakes. I love that. So that's where a teacher could really come in handy, and the teacher will focus on really making corrections only in that area. Right? If you say you're sweeping back to the simple past at that point, those are the corrections that that teacher needs to make, and only those. I love that, I love that. Exactly. Okay, Chris. That is a new suggestion that we haven't heard on this show yet, and we've done 600 episodes. Well, we've done 600 episodes, and probably 150 or 200 guest episodes. Wow. So, I like that, I like that. It sounds like you have a slightly different approach and let's keep moving though. What's your second tip for how we can gain confidence through grammar? [Instrumental] Today you're hearing about the way that I move my students from feeling insecure about their grammar to feeling confident and ready to speak with anyone. Stop fearing that you'll make grammar mistakes. When you book a lesson with me, we'll use my unique method to get you to your goals.

32 32 [Instrumental] Start by registering at AllEarsEnglish.com/italki for a free $10 credit, then book a lesson with me at italki.com/chrisrush. C-H-R-I-S-R-U-S-H. Okay. So this is the third one. The first tip was... Okay. More of the "go backwards" one. Okay. Old tenses first. And then, the third. The second one was the corrections. Okay, got it. And then the third one. So this is huge, and this is the most important thing. So in English, we talk about, and this goes into other languages too, but we talk about in English, having a gut feeling. Like when you know something with your stomach more than you know it... Mm. In your head. Ohh. That... I think that notion translates into lots of different languages, but that's how well you need to know the tense. You need to know a tense so well that it goes from your brain knowledge to this idea of, like, your stomach knowledge. Right. And I think a lot of students tell me that they understand this because it's, like, I ask them a question, "Which tense?" and they say, This one." And I say, "How do you know?" and they say, "It just feels right."

33 33 Right, right. And that's what we're looking for here. We're looking for the kind... This is the mark. You'll know that you have one tense mastered when you don't even need to think about it anymore. When it just comes out, it's 100 percent correct. Your stomach is smarter than your head. You don't need to stop and say, "Okay, present perfect is the present tense..." Right. Of "have" and the past participle..." No. If you're doing that... I mean, and that's where you start. And that's where we start with every tense. And that's where we have to start, but if you're still having to have those thoughts in your head, that's how you know you're just not ready to move on. Okay. You're ready to move on when you're speaking with a 100 percent accuracy and here's the... Here's the key. You are confident when you... Yes. Have this thought that says, "Ohh, past simple. I can do this. I know..." "... I can speak in the past simple." And guess what? There is your confidence. I love it. That's the thing you need to help you communicate. Mm. And once you have it with one tense, then you can move on to the next one and start building it with the more advanced tenses. Ohh. Okay, Chris, I love this because it makes confidence very measurable, right? Sometimes we struggle with the term confidence

34 34 because we don't know what it means. It sounds like this kind of unknown thing that's out there that other people have, but we don't know what it is. But here, today, in this episode, Chris, you're making confidence measurable. And it sounds like what it is it's when we get to that point of a gut feeling, that our gut knows we're saying it correctly and we're no longer in our head thinking, "Okay. In this sentence I need to use past simple. And then we're... We're going ahead and figuring that out. We know it and we're spitting it out immediately and automatically. I love that. And I think that's really the dream of a lot of our listeners here. And... You know that's... I'm sorry, go ahead. But that's... That's really great. I've never even thought of it that way, as, like, measuring confidence but... I think I'm going to use that in my lessons now. Because that's really great. Thanks for telling me that. Ohh, that's perfect. I mean, this is your framework, Chris. I love this. I mean, I think this could really help a lot of our students. I have one question before we move on to... To learning where our students, our listeners, could actually work with you if they like the idea of this framework of measuring confidence in this way and working towards it. One question, Chris, is where do you think listening comes into play here? Listening to native English? Okay. That's a really great question. So when... When you're operating from this kind of perspective it helps make listening focused. Okay.

35 35 So we... We talk about this kind of passive listening. And passive listening is great, where you sit on the couch, you watch a movie in English, you know. Maybe the subtitles are on, maybe they're not. And it's good exposure. But the way that you can implement this kind of framework into listening is by... Listening in a more active way. You're not just listening to get the general understanding. You're listening for something. For something specific. So when you're watching something or listening to something, like this podcast, "Where are they using the past simple?" Listen carefully for it. And "Where... Where are they using it in a way that I might make mistakes?" Like, you made a great example with "did". So we can approach listening with... By kind of activating our mind, in a way, to say, "I'm going to listen for this specific tense and I'm going to see how many times they conjugate a verb in that way." In, let's just say, in this podcast. Okay. I love it. And so, it sounds like, in order to make this framework work for us, we need a razor sharp focus. You need to remain super focused on that tense, on that moment, on that month, that week, whatever it is. Is that right? Yeah (yes), totally right.

36 36 Because confidence, confidence is not just going to bestow itself upon you somehow. No. When you reach some magical level, you know, in the future, that you don't have now. It's about taking these concrete steps and doing these actions that are... That are within your current abilities, that are going to give you confidence. And by doing it this way you don't have to be a C1 or an advanced speaker before you have confidence. You can have confidence as... As a late beginner. As a low intermediate level. Mm. Whatever level that you are, confidence is something that's accessible to you, through your grammar, by approaching it in this way. Ohh, I love this. I think a lot of our listeners would really find that this fashion, this style, this framework, would really mesh with their... With their goals and the way that they want to approach learning English. So I want to invite our listeners to go over and work with you on italki. Because guys, this is the way to do it. This is the way to build confidence. Chris can help you get there. Chris, is your schedule filling up? Where are you at in terms of availability? So the way that my availability goes is that I do have room for students. So it usually just takes a few days to get a lesson. Okay. So, usually the next three days ahead of where we are now are pretty full, but after that there's definitely room on my schedule for students. Awesome. I love it. So this episode's going to be coming out around mid, early to mid-october. So this is a really good time, guys. Go on over there

37 37 and book your lesson. The weather's getting cold, it's getting chilly out. It's a good time to hone in on our goals. This is prime learning season. Love it. So guys, there are two steps to book a lesson with Chris. First step is to go to our landing page, AllEarsEnglish.com/italki. And the reason you want to register there is that if you register there we'll send you $10 for free to go towards your second lesson with Chris. And your second step is to go to Chris' profile and book that lesson. So Chris, where can our listeners go to book that lesson with you? So it's I-T-A-L-K-I,.com/, my name, Chris Rush. So it's One word. That's my profile. Okay. C-H-R-I-S-R-U-S-H. Is that right? Yes, that's correct. Okay, awesome. So I really want to encourage our listeners to go on over there. Guys, book a lesson with Chris because this looks to me like one of the most direct routes to confidence using grammar that I've seen in a long time. It's simple, it's immediately actionable, and I bet it's quite effective. I mean, you must have a lot of success stories, Chris. I do, yes. And, of course, on my italki teacher profile you can see, not only my video, but my reviews from current and past students as well. Awesome. Any final messages for our listeners today? No. But it was great to be here. I'm so excited to be part of the All Ears English podcast and thank you so much for having me, Lindsay. Thanks, Chris. We hope to have you on again soon. Okay. Thank you. Alright, take care. Bye. Bye.

38 38 [Instrumental] Announcer: Thanks so much for listening to All Ears English. And if you need a seven or higher on your IELTS exam to achieve your life vision, then our Insider Method can get you there. Start with our free video series master class. Get video one now at AllEarsEnglish.com/INSIDER, and if you believe in Connection NOT Perfection, then subscribe to our show on your phone or on your computer. See you next time.

39 39 AEE Episode 616: Can You Say No to a Nosey Person in American Culture? Announcer: This is an All Ears English Podcast Episode 616: Can You Say No to a Nosey Person in American Culture? [Instrumental] Announcer: Welcome to the All Ears English Podcast, downloaded more than 16 million times. We believe in Connection NOT Perfection, with your American hosts Lindsay McMahon, the English Adventurer, and Michelle Kaplan, the New York Radio Girl, coming to you from Boston and New York City, U.S.A. [Instrumental] Announcer: And to instantly download your transcript from today s episode, go to AllEarsEnglish.com/transcripts, AllEarsEnglish.com/transcripts. [Instrumental] Announcer: Today we respond to a question from a listener of episode 596 from Brazil. When is it okay to say no to someone who's asking you a nosey question? Find out today.

40 40 [Instrumental] Hey (hi) Michelle, how you doing today? Hey (hi) Lindsay, I'm good, how are you? I'm doing pretty well, recording here on a Friday morning. So, you know, looking forward to the weekend. I'm actually going to a wedding this weekend. That should be fun. Ooh. That's fun. That's fun. I know, I know. I went to one last weekend. You did? How was that? Yeah (yes), it was really fun. It was really fun, for sure. Awesome. What's your favorite thing about going to weddings? The dancing. The dancing? Yeah (yes), yeah (yes). I like that, too. That's fun. Yeah (yes), and the food. Huh. Yeah (yes), for sure the food. And the cake! Yeah (yes)! And I do like watching the bride walking down the aisle. It's always romantic. Oh, it's very romantic. I know! It's beautiful. Can bring a tear to your eyes sometimes. Ohh, for sure.

41 41 Nosey?" So Michelle, today we have a very interesting topic because we got a response from Fernando Lima. Who I believe is from Brazil. He's one of our regular listeners. Fernando has been a listener of All Ears English for years, as far as I know. I recognize his name. Hi, Fernando! Saying hi to Fernando. Thank you for being such a long-time listener. And Fernando left us a comment on one of our episodes, recent episodes, which was episode 596. Michelle, what did we teach in episode 596? So, 596, it was "How to Be Direct in English When Someone Is Being And what does "nosey" mean? Let's just remind our listeners in case we forgot here? Nosey is to, like... I don't know, always be in your business, to kind of go over the, like, to want to know too much about, you know. It's not really appropriate. Exactly. They go over, they cross the line. They ask a question that's kind of impeding on your privacy and moving into your space. Some topics that might be nosey that we talked about in that episode were things like salary, how much do you make, right? Way too blunt to ask that question in American culture. Right.

42 42 Or, too, things about your family, like personal details about your family, or maybe about a divorce or something. Right? Right. Or personal details about your relationship, or questions about your job. Right? Right. Right, right, right. So depending on the question, those questions can definitely be nosey. For sure. But Fernando's response was interesting because we introduced a bunch of phrases, and Fernando thought that our phrases were a little bit too direct. And the idea of literally saying "No" to someone, meaning... Let's just read his question. Why don't we do that? Okay. Would you do that, Michelle? Yes, of course. Mmm. Okay. So it starts with a "Well, that is a different culture you tried to discuss here. In my culture, people, including myself, have huge problems; it's very difficult to say "No". I understand if it's hard to believe, but saying something like, "I'd rather not say." is considerably awkward. Usually we try to deflect, smile, and stay neutral, but we seldom say "No" to anybody. How does this work in American culture, being objective and saying a big "No" to another person? Is it okay in a conversation for the person who receives a negative answer? Thank you, girls." Good question. Good question, Fernando, and I love this idea that students/listeners here are responding to episodes. And we are more than happy to do follow-up episodes. For sure!

43 43 We want to do that. That creates a fun little conversation between us and you guys. Right. And we want that. So, if you do have a strong reaction to an episode, leave a comment. And if it's a good one, if it's thought provoking, we will respond to your comment in an episode. I love that. I love that. Definitely. Yes. So this one is really a good one. I like this question. It's great, I love it. So let's go back to that first episode then, Michelle, 596. What were the phrases that we taught in that episode? Okay, we said, "I'd rather not discuss this right now. Can we talk about something else?" Yup (yes). Then the second solution is just to laugh and deflect. To laugh and deflect. Okay. The next one is, "Ohh, I don't know." Or, "Sure, sure." Something neutral. Right, right, okay. And then the next one was, "I'd rather not say." Which is what Fernando referred to. Okay? Right. And then we have, "Let's change the subject." Okay. And then the last one was...? "I'm not really comfortable talking about this too much right now." Okay. So it seems to me that not all of these are blatantly saying "No". Right? No.

44 44 Right? There are some, Fernando, that I think could be, you know, less strong than saying "No". Right? Things like, "Ohh, let's talk about something else. Let's change the subject." Right. Or just, "Ohh, I don't know." Or, "Sure, sure." That one, too. So we are giving you guys a few tools that you could use, even in your culture, if you don't want to say... If you're speaking in English with another Brazilian, for example. If you're able to do that, a lot of people don't want to do that and it feels silly. But if you are, for any reason, you could use some of these less strong ones. But I think Fernando's question is, he's interested in, is in American culture, you know, is it okay to say these things? Saying this blatant "No, I want to talk about something else." Right. Okay. Well, yeah (yes). I think, first of all, it's important to realize, yeah (yes), he said that it could be awkward. And the truth is, that it is awkward. Right? So that's important to realize in the first place, because this person is being nosey. Mhh hmm, right. Like, there's not, I don't know, I mean, yeah (yes), maybe, I'm not sure if we said, "Ohh, it's not awkward at all."

45 45 I don't remember exactly, but, like, the truth is that sometimes these situations are awkward. Yes. So somebody might say these things. It really depends on the person, but I think it's important to realize that, like, pretty much, it's gonna be awkward. Right? That's a good point. That's a good point, Michelle. And I think that that speaks to the idea of what is this expression to nip it in the bud, or the butt. I don't know which the expression is. To stop it right away. Right. Because it's actually going to get more awkward. Right. If you aren't direct. In your... I mean, one way to look at it is that if you're not directly saying, "No, I don't want to talk about this." Then that person's not getting the message. Then they'll come back with that later. Right, right. They'll keep trying to ask you the question, and it will be even more awkward. Right. But... Right. Yes. I don't know if we were trying to say, "Ohh, it's not awkward." I don't know.

46 46 But the truth is... But, you know, you're right that it definitely could be awkward, but let's talk more about it. Let's talk more about it. And also we know, I mean, we've traveled. Right? We've lived in different countries. We know that this varies dramatically across cultures, and that's what this is about. This is a cultural issue. Plain and simple. Right. Okay? So, for example, what stands out in my mind is, I remember when I was living in Japan. I rarely, if ever, heard the word "No", which I think in Japanese is iie, something like that. Our Japanese listeners can correct us. But there are other words that were inserted, from my understanding, which is kind of elementary. Other words that were inserted into a sentence to mean "No", but to not actually say "No," to soften a rejection. Such as, for example, shoto. This word would be used, it kind of, in my understanding, it meant, like, a little bit, like, a little bit no. So you're saying shoto deis. You're saying, "I don't quite want to do that, but I don't want to say, 'No, I don't want to do that.'" Right? Mhh hmm So that's just one example in a culture like Japan, where there's a rejection of the idea of saying "No". We don't want to say it. And that's acceptable. I mean, there are reasons for that throughout history, why certain cultures didn't want to upfront reject people to their face, and that makes sense. Okay? It makes me think of an episode of Friends, of course. And I think it's, like, really early on. I think, like, Ross is moving or something.

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