Week 6: Hocus Pocus It s all about keeping your glow. But first Let s talk about Saving A Relationship
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1 Week 6: Hocus Pocus It s all about keeping your glow. But first Let s talk about Saving A Relationship
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3 Magic Ingredient #1 The beauty of Questions. The beauty of Questions. How the Brain works: Just like a Search Engine - The Questions we ask = what we focus on. What we focus on = what we become. Why am I so ugly? -Guess the Brain s response
4 We Can Pick the Questions we ask ourselves. Magic Ingredient #2: Living in the Moment - Stories of clients having men hand them roses. - Stop them in the Elevator The Charisma Myth Story of Marilyn Monroe vs Norma Jean The moment gets you out of your head The moment is often boring The moment lowers the shield you have around your heart and you start to GLOW. It s not what pops in your head, it s how long you play with it.
5 It is SOOOO counter intuitive. Every client who was in the ZONE had this in common, they weren t trying or thinking too much. This is what happens: 4/14 Kathy Hi all, I have been having the most amazing experiences, people (especially men) are gushing compliments toward me! I've been practicing Bob's exercises for about 6 weeks and the response is overwhelming. Today I bought a new car. While at the dealership EVERY man there went out of his way to talk to me. The man helping me with the sale told me that I was the nicest customer they have ever had (& I live in a nice town!). The owner of the dealership asked to speak with me before I left and he asked me, how are you so happy? I see over 400 customers a week and you stand out so far from all of them. I want to introduce you to a man I know - I think you two would really get along. I had no idea I was behaving any differently than before, but people (especially men) are behaving differently toward me. I've even gained 10 pounds & wasn't matching very well today. Haha Bob, I can't thank you enough. I knew I needed to shift things inside of
6 me, and you're giving me the tools and guidance I need. Thank you thank you thank you Magic Ingredient #3: Give Him What He Wants (Don t leave it to feelings) The idea of Chemistry, Organic, Or a Good match is often lazy. It comes from the myth that if I just pick the right person, everything is effortless. If you know what he likes/needs and give him that, he ll become emotionally dependent on you. And you ll share what you really need The emphasis is on giving what they want Not just what you like to give. Biggest Threat to this is SHOULD. He Should (or shouldn t).
7 Should or Shouldn t = almost regardless of how you act. If you withhold what he needs/wants are you basing it on a realistic Should or Your own Should? When you think he SHOULD (or Shouldn t) - add this always no matter how I treat him. He should be faithful. He shouldn t hit me. View yourself as a Cook and he is the Dish. What are you making by how you treat him? He should be nice to me. He should listen to me. He should take care of me when I m sick? It s not about Fair, it s about results.
8 Try vs Results Oriented That s the choice Fair or Magic If you opt for magic, it produces what I call The Campfire Effect. But.. This usually happens in Pockets - an a-ha moment. Alexandra Andrews
9 Hi Bob, I took this class because a friend suggested it. I had not read any of your books etc so took a leap of faith. I am so glad I listened! A lot has happened since the class started. My intention was to get better equipped to go out and date and meet new men and hopefully to find a great new guy. I did meet someone and his business went through a crisis and he called me and said Basically, You (Alex) are too distracting and I need all of my focus to save my store or I could loose it. So I need to put this on hold till around March or April... I didn't freak out lol. I was cool and calm and understanding. These past few weeks I have been applying everything from the class to my relationship and last Saturday we went on a road trip, two hours to a crystal, jewelry show. He picked me up at 7 am, I have difficulty with my stomach and got car sick...the entire way...two hours ended up three hours...nightmare...he was wonderful! Caring! Not mad or upset and we talked about all of that plus I was able to say everything I was feeling, and how when I have sex I give a piece of my heart and bond...the changing to causal dating and how sex doesn't go with that for me. The switch was flipped. I keep hearing your voice, "Pace Him" (I'm trying!) I'm also not super crazy invested in the old crazy way as in... This is the only guy, I have to bend over backwards to keep" him because if not him then No One! Because I know now, if not him...there will be another guy! This new way of seeing myself and being Real and finally believing in who I am and what I have to offer is amazing and unique and special has really taken the pressure off.
10 I am only responsible for what I can control. Bob, You won t believe this but today a man rushed across the street, he was on the other side, bought flowers from a street vendor and gave them to me. He said, I couldn t help myself. Is this what you ve been talking about? -Tiffany Let's Review.
11 Our Goal: to keep moving down the line Getting Ex Back Accepting His Offer Auditioning Men Grieving EX Selecting HIM - What has been the most helpful thing you've learned/experienced? What has been the hardest? What 2 things will you focus on over the next 2 months? 1. I will
12 2. I will Or If you want to continue with me, I ve got a couple of options for you. 1) If you re ready to Make It Happen then Posted on I ll make you my VIP client. We will have 1 goal You tell me what you want and we ll focus everything on that for the next 5 months.
13 - You and I will meet weekly to chart your You tell me your dream and I m with you side by side showing you how to MAKE IT HAPPEN. For this advanced program We ll talk every week for the next 5 months. I ll also keep the facebook group open for everyone. - For the 5 month Advanced Program - $5000 upfront for a generous discount. Or If you want to speak with me whenever you like, on a session by session basis. $395/Session But no facebook group.
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